driftingaway

our way of life

2009-12-13T17:49:00.002+08:00

sometimes i wonder what my instructor had said to me before... he said that if people really wanted to meet, no matter how busy they are, there will always find time to meet. then i would then ponder about what a friend had said to me once, and realize that maybe that could be the sad truth.
thats kinda making it hard to organise things for them now.
i just wanna say, though we all once had walked together and now we have all drifted apart with the tides of time, i will never forget the fact that we were all dear dear friends and that i hope that we may all come together once again.

this week has been a much inspiring week as it marks a jump in many of us. on the gravity of our rank, our situation and of course, what have to think and act.
well this is all thanks to our ACPC... but my lasting impression of it is... i have never eaten in such a slow and refined manner before-_- but nevertheless, food was top class.

leaving this week, i brought two quotes back with me.
this is our way of life, we must cherish and preserve it... just today i was cleaning up my laptop's desktop... then i found the old folder containing all the pw stuff i had... man it brings back all the memories. something which i feel was supposedly a chore then, but now seems more like a fleeting dream to me.

marry the woman you love. AND love the woman you marry.
think about its difference

left right left

2009-12-06T17:26:00.002+08:00

countdown... 2 more weeks
this also equates to 2 more weeks of marching with our most beloved SSM... oh well guess the hard work will pay off. I just hope that my arms wont drop off before the actual day itself.

besides the parade, life has been rather relaxed now despite the tight schedule we have. we just have to attend the many lectures and parade rehearsals and thats that, no more running around with the weapon in hand=)

well the week has also been a rather good time for me to do some reading up with more spare time now and also me being bored of the games on the psp. been reading tuesday with morrie and thought it is a really interesting book, i find it rather disturbing-_- lol but the book did made me see things in a different way. man, this is really making me into some emo boy sitting down in one corner reading my book and being in my own world sia. i wonder have i become more antisocial... but i guess how one define himself is in the thing he does and how he leave his mark. but just how do we leave our mark here, in this time. by the people we know? the things we do? or the feelings we leave behind?

man, life is so cant-fusing

its been... awhile

2009-11-28T21:43:00.002+08:00

man, its been so long since i last touched this page. well, partially due to my own laziness to even think about typing my own entry-_- haha so here i am now with nothing to do so think its time for me to catch up with my blog.

life is finally taking a right turn now, been having left ones for some time now, as it is going on to joint term and i only have 3 weeks left with ocs... that would equate to no more outfield and all the chiong sua stuff. yes, march every single day. haha well at least its better than mugging every single day LOL like all the poor souls in uni now. but guess they will have their liberation soon. hopefully for them.

then the holiday period is just round the corner, which would mean tonnes of stuff like movies to watch, great deals to shop and tonnes of offs to have. and all these require a very critical resource which is also quite hard to come by now called money -_- hiaz, i always wonder were all my money go to.
guess going abit more independent is quite difficult... especially managing finances.

but still, lots of interesting stuff keep on happening. like stumbling onto FML.com, damn funny website... completing our CSB, which was suppose to mean COMBAT skills badge... but we somehow made it into a CLUBBING skills badge haha, how? sing lor... its like a club on the move for 32km - the bartender - the atmosphere + FBO

and yeah, started playing bejeweled blitz... probably the worst decision i made thus far... lol
and oh yeah, life's cant-fusing. seems to be my favourite phrase now. especially in understanding people now.... hiaz.. damn

post taiwan.... fever...

2009-11-02T18:14:00.003+08:00

finally... i finally got myself to the com to tryt o update my facebook and blog.... just felt damn sian to do this kind of stuff.. well acutally been feeling rather sian doing anything for these few days lol...

well cause i miss taiwan, it was really a fun trip though actually i dont have much stuff to say bout it. lol... or rather its actually to much to really type out and not really letting the whole world know bout it. just go look at the photos and see for yourself ya.

one thing is for certain... sg atually dont have much stuff to do ya... sian...

the feel was different when i left. now it changed-_- man i hate this kind of stuff... lucky still got shuli ya! hahaha. well book in now.

time really flies

gone and back again and going to be off again

2009-10-08T22:37:00.002+08:00

ahh its been awhile since i last blogged... well life has been the same, fine, ok, hmm not too bad.

hmm well actually life has been more than just fine for me these last few weeks. but most of them has just been army stuff which is rather pointless to talk about as unless you are a singaporean guy who has been through ns or is going through it then you will most likely understand... other than that it has only been bout the weekends... yes, the weekends

well weekends are well... hmmm... well? hahaha.... nothing much to say bout it mah cause it will be either to slack at home or to go out with friends =D which was what happened last last week and last week respectively haha

kinda forgot what happened last last week but for last week me shu and sam went to bowl then watch cloudy with a chance of meatballs... haha well it was kinda a good movie but it was kinda lame to me... but nevertheless it was a sweet love story in cartoon hahaha.. touched on liking a person based on their inner self instead of just looks. cant really say 2 thumbs up for the show cause it was lame so shall just give it one and a half thumbs up =D oh and well before the movie... sam was late-_- but then i got a chance to talk to shuli yea... good to have a nice long talk with bro hahaha... no funny idea ah shuli -_-

haha well things are just sometimes like this... life is always unpredictable and you can just never tell what is going to happen next... ESPECIALLY GIRLS AND SLUT ( well not the real sluts but like the slut ho etc etc) i swear, i'll never understand them.... one moment they could tell you these and the next moment it might have someother meaning.... well things are different now... i'll just be neutral.... trying very hard. dont let emotions run... like getting pissed, moved, touched, angry, happy, sad, crazy, emo etc etc....

for eg i went out with the guys today hahaha for lan which was damn fun, gotta do it again some other time hahaha and then after which we went to seoul garden for lunch and then jalan jalan around orchard for awhile b4 going to watch movie... which was cancelled cause of the ho..... see one moment say damn confirm but then next moment... hiaz... oh well... but still the day was really fun and swell, i really enjoy my time with the foxtrot guys yea.. fun bunch to be with.
haha and since the movie was cancelled, ne and hong taa went jalan jalan again and saw some rather interesting stuff like the new paper girl finals and some store grand opening hahaha.. oh and we went to ion to see this valrhona chocolate.... and oh my... its damn nice... but well, being nice does comes with a price ya... haha

well.. tml is bowling with the guy again... haha happy and sad ya.
happy to go out
sad to have less time to spend...
with who or doing what leh?.... hmm

peace... before the storm

2009-09-21T15:52:00.003+08:00

well well well... this week was the ultimate week... the dream that most of us never dreamt about before. because it was a damn damn damn damn damn slack week.... well not exactly slack.... it was just because it was lessons the whole week and nothing really physical going on....

however, the week was also rather fun... for starters there was this cohesion and hari raya celebration night for our wing on thurs... and i tell you it was NICE hahaha cause the performance by bryan and youjin stuart combo was great man... hahaha bring the house down...
or rather dining hall A hahaha....

then on sat it was... Majong day!!!! except! it was just a facade hahahaha! cause it was shuli's birthday surprise! hahaha HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAN! hoped you liked it yea! hahaha well i was kinda worried of the ppl that were going to come cause at one point of time it seemed like there was only going to be only 3 ppl....hiaz... always only me sam and shuli...

but now hahahaha, wenqi will become the 4th player!!! hahaha =D now you cant run away!

ahh after that, at night there was another surprise birthday party... this one was for youjin HAHAHA! well it was kinda a series of funny events
1) i was early even though i was late -_- meet at 7 i arrived at 715... no one there yet
2) i was texting wilbert on my way up the escalator when i saw youjin and he saw me >.< ya ="D" already =")">.<>.< but well it was a great time chatting with them ya... mens talk. nice

well... its been awhile since this kind of things happened... but i dont know, it feelts weird... and it feels funny and wrong...well... guess its back to army for now...

hope things dont go the way www.fmylife.com

sianz...

2009-09-13T10:24:00.002+08:00

well its an ultra short book out that we are going to have again but i guess it will be one of those more fruitful ones that i will be having in quite the while hahah....

well there was the comms parade for the C/H wing yesterday which we had to help out as their juniors cause well.... its tradition. But yeah, the catch phrase is, " your time will come " and well its true cause in 3 months time it will be our turn next and our juniors will be in the same position we had been in...... gosh its been fast... just talking to one of those service term cadets reminded me that a few months back... i was in their shoes....

after the whole parade and dinner, well instead of being good boys that we should be and booking out and go home, i chose to go meet up with friends for late night movie instead LOL. well its meeting up with yakai and hector hahaha. well its been awhile since the 3 of us just went out together ya and it was great to catch up with one another =D

it was nothing much, just caught a movie, the blood ties... wow great but kinda horrifying sia the show... but definitely worth the watch though. then we went to chijme... well my first time there >.<>.< hahaha but still liked it man.. shall try more next time.

ahh... i'm in the damn sian mode now.... man life's just too god damn sian now... i don't know. something is damn wrong with me. everything is just so mundane, so boring... so the same....
waking up and do the same crap in camp....
going home and think of the same shit....
thinking about friends and family is the same every bookout....
thinking bout the book in everytime i'm out...

its not bad... i mean, i feel that my life... especially recent events... made me feel that, well, i dont have any specific interest or passion in my life..... or that i have just been neglecting it... my life... has been kinda screwed... down side up, left side right??? LOL

being sian and alone with the damn alot of free time, i think, has its benefits bah hahaha

of values and of changes

2009-09-06T17:06:00.000+08:00

well it was an extremely short week which ended with lots of homework... for the first time.... man i can't believe i have so much essays to do now >.<

well, nothing much to say bout the week just that i'm rather disappointed now, hiaz, it just so hard to get ppl out now since sch has started... all the tutorials, lectures, sch stuff etc... just need to get one more majong kaki can ler >.<

well its only during this weekend that i feel the change... even though it was ust 3 weeks out of sg, it was also the period of change when sch starts and all the guys start to get busy with other stuffs too.... well there were also many stuff that happened... for good or for bad i wont say but guess everyone has different aims in life and more stuff to think about now... but, what i feel is that even as things change, there are things that would always remain constant in our lives... our values and the things we hold dear in our hearts... those things should always remain true to ourselves....

and man.... i'm totally cashless now -_- sian.... gotta save for my future man.... oh man why am i talking bout this... really makes me feel old... guess it must be those insurance letters, hp bills and comms ball payment.... plt fund -_- hiaz.... money still makes the world goes round huh... and the comms ball is on a wed... hard enough to get ppl on a weekend already....

you dont need to put a person under stress and fatigue to see their true personality at all though we seen that happen in brunei... guess i've learn that a person in his or her comfort zone is the true blue package as well... man... wonder who came out with the phrase " dont judge a book by its cover ".... guess its alwayas good to be observant

its been swell

2009-09-02T17:47:00.002+08:00

well after a kinda long 4 days break its back to the old times of emo-ing bout book in.... LOL well the emo part is gone now actually cause well, guess life wont be as bad now. (hopefully)
haha this break has been nothing but really just slacking my ass off and trying to cram in as much goodies into my stomach as much as i can.... well i did fall short of my original plan cause of various constrains....

original plan was:
sun(touch down): breakfast: bk at T2 followed by one burger each from any fastfood restaurant i find( didnt managed due to financial difficulties)
lunch: mom's chicken rich =D
dinner: ikea Swedish meat balls =P
mon: breakfast: eat myself silly at the hawker centre (woke up late -_-)
lunch: jui mu's curry + bee hoon
dinner: 1 x carnivore at vivo =D man, i wan to eat their beef ribs again T.T + ben and jerry's ice cream (was too god damn full) had haagendaz instead back at tamp
tues: breakfast: minced meat noodles at bedok (had to go temple with mom -_-)
lunch: shokudo
dinner: California pizza ($$$ not enough)

well.... its just too bad that there is too much good food out there and just not enough money now... gotta save up for my future now and i cant splurge too much ler..... hmm maybe i still can for the up coming gathering.... haha yeah, majong again =D

well i'm thinking of starting a to do/get list now after seeing so many of my friends starting it, guess it ought start it too... kinda getting old too =p better put it here so everytime i come back home i can remind myself

things to eat: cafe cartel, kushinbo, ben&jerry, crystal jade's porriage, california pizza
things to get: comfortable shoes( saw this geox snake in men's health), supernova running apparels, a good watch(alt meter, compass, airpressure, time, heart rate, hmm am i asking too much), camera** must get b4 taiwan anyone lobang pls tell me, aldo leather shoes, new pants and shirt

to do: go cycle to pasir ris park again, finish my games b4 halo:odst comes, read finish my halo novels so i can start reading harry potter after how long? LOL, read my times and readers digest, clean my room-_-

3 weeks out of sg and things have changed, the girls are in uni now and i hardly even see anyone of my classmates online now....what i found really sad was that normally during teachers day ppl would all go back to see our teachers but for this year, guess everyone has grown up and we're all different now... i do feel that i'm close with my class anymore and well i got my own path to go =|
thank goodness there is always the majong peeps there =D

its good to be back

2009-09-01T14:55:00.002+08:00

finally... its good to be back. After that 3 weeks of training in brunei, i can say that most of us guys came back to singapore with one thing in mind.... food. haha but that is besides the point... any sane singaporean who leaves singapore is sure to be back with food on their mind.... but i guess for us, we kinda see it in a different light now( well at least for me )

guess it must have been the jcc experience for us.... well i cant say much bout it here but all i can say that this was one hell of a course... you do it once and i bet you wouldnt want to do it again... it was a time when i got the chance to have a first for lots of things.
the first time i had one pack of biscuit for 2 days...
the first time i shivered myself to sleep...
first time when i had to eat wild plants and fruits courtesy of my buddy
and the list goes on... really the jungle man kinda things which i have no point in saying it here cause most people wont understand or how should i say, feel my pain =D hahaha

but being in the brunei jungle for those few day and for the whole 3 weeks there, i have had ample time to really see how i "ran" myself all these times.... it really gave me time to see that i'm not that a selfless person as most of my friends say i am.... things got abit hectic and messy and when there is no one to depend on and true colours start flying, people will start to understand themselves better.....

well i came to 3 conclusions that i should do and change when i get back to sg
1) take better care of myself... only then can i better help others
2)read more... seriously, i suck so i should read more
3) start to save...

yeah. but still, bottom line is it's good to be back... cant wait to see my friends again.. hahaha
oh and on a side note, i think i lost 5+ kg during the jcc... but then i just weigh myself and found that 1X buffet at carnivore does the job man =P

what will you protect and JCC

2009-08-09T20:51:00.002+08:00

finally the faithful has come.... its the time to depart from singapore to brunei and for our long long training trip there.... well even as how sian/ anxious/ sad i am, i feel that deep down inside of me, i just hope that i will be able to come back safely and spend time with family and friends again.

oh sure alot of people has said that brunei would be one hell of a trip... but i'm rather assured that i'm in safe hands as we really had lots of training to prepare us for this course. =D haha well how were we prepared... hmm lets say we climbed lots of hills and did jungle sims like twice =D hahaha
i'm sure that climbing up the hill for a total of 55 times... oh yea, 55 times will surely help us overcome all odds in brunei...

besides just the training, i feel that its actually the motivation that one has that will eventually be the factor that decides whether one will succeed.... well for one i was actually feeling rather down recently cause of the impending brunei trip... kinda dreaded it cause i always get this really bad feeling about being all alone in the jungle though i know and as one of my friend said to me once " if i throw you into the jungle now you confirm can survive one" i know i wont have that physical barrier, but its the mental barrier... and really, i got to thank my friends for really cheering me up these few day ya!

especially my tkd peeps ya! thx to huimin and samantha for the majong and dinner on sat =D haha really cheered me up and made my day ya! well seeing that there are still people that still remembers is always nice, and how looking back at my jc days where i hardly spent time with them and that we are all still close, its really heart warming.... i'll be sure to treasure the photo that we all took and bring it to brunei =D

sometimes i wonder am i being to sentimental... cause today is also singapore's birthday and i finally heard the national day song which was titled " what do you see" well its not bad thats all i would say... but more importantly was about the phrase that was what will you protect which as a nsf.... is a very important thing for me to think about.... family friends and maybe those special people to me...

all thats done is done... i'll just have to survive it out now... and when i'm back:
steak at nydc
out with sam and peeps to cycle
meet with minmin and tata and shuli bros
party it out with lucas and 4B peeps
come back with jcc badge for Fab and all the non infantry tango plt 3!
meet up with yakai again ya!
catch with all my s101 friends
share my exp with amir who will be going then
find out whether i have really met one who really is
change... i hope that being by myself in a foreign place would really make me know myself

survive and overcame like i've never done before

2009-08-02T00:43:00.002+08:00

well this week was the bomb man.... really hardcore into training for the upcoming jungle confidence course. well wont say much here first cause well... sob sob got to book in in like 6 hours time? cause oh well thank to certain individual, i got weekend duty so got to return to camp.

but well impt date to note is that next sunday 9th aug is national day and the date i'm flying off... anyone wanna send me pls do come =D will be at airport hahaha

till next weekend then. and oh, they said there will be this mailing thingy in brunei for friends and family members to write to us =D so nice ut wonder if anyone will use -_-... but looking at how close my other plt mates are with their friends and family guess they will most likely use it...

just got that feeling that its rather lonely out there for me... dont really have any really close friends but oh well, things will turn out somehow ya.... gotta stay +ve

ps: i managed to get my rochor tau hui =D even though i went alone... shall go there with family next week

a rather eventful week

2009-07-25T09:01:00.003+08:00

well this week has passed by rather quickly cause we had 2 big key events. they were namely the jc visit and ex wildcat which was a navigation kind of thing. well looking back at both events it has thought me one very important thing: that is to be confident in your preparations and to run the show well, dont let all that preparations all go to waste.

well life is getting tougher now, it is gradually becoming more physically demanding and more mentally straining. but i guess that is the part and parcel of our training to become better. to me, rising up to this challenge is a very huge task, but to see everyone working towards a same goal even as my platoon commander always say, " we come from many places all across the land" gives me the drive to move on. we work together and strive together. guess that is my drive to lead.

and man, its really been awhile since i saw my jc classmates, cant wait to see them later during college day... well everytime i go online, its always that colume that has 0 online so guess everyone is getting busy now.... time flies yea

ps: avon got a very interesting blog

new specs and book in

2009-07-19T19:27:00.002+08:00

well gonna book in ler... as always... siansss...
o and i got a new pair of specs... no big deal, looks the same but it was a rather funny occasion. made me realize that in the whole of singapore, all the guys are really bonded by ns sia hahahaha

the short book out...

2009-07-19T00:52:00.002+08:00

this is gonna be a short book out trip man... and even though my left leg is dying from pain and agony of the fast march, i will still go out hahaha
met with the octopuswith8legs then went to buy tickets for harry potter and yeah, who said i can get back row sits for 7 ppl ah =p hahahaha and then we watched it withtmy tkd peeps ya.

movie was kinda disappointing as it was ather draggy and no link in some scenes... it was kinda like a movie to see dumbledore die and yeah... i am the half blood prince lol
but well not saying that the movie wasnt good, it was just yeah, disappointing

after that had dinner at the bbq restaurant at tamp one... man, this was a total agreement made by me zhanyi and shuli... the shop front girl was very cute hahaha, well zhanyi hormones couldnt take it LOL but yeah, she was cute, clever for the manager to place her there lol

so then after which got a short majong session and that kinda concludes the day.

hmmm the tkd club is kinda becoming a scandaling club sia -_- hiaz.... youth nowadays ah.... hormones ah.... lol but well guess its normal, gosh i'm making myself sound so old sia hahaha

there was one thing that a certain someone told me about uni.... " ppl confirm will have time to meet up one, its only whether they wanna meet you anot." haha guess thats true, no matter how tired or how busy, if you really cherish your friends, family or that special someone, you would always make time for them....
there's always time, but as time goes by, things just get faded away...it not the quantity of time spent together ya, its always the quality that counts.

outing with cousin

2009-07-15T14:35:00.002+08:00

HAHA yesterday was a rather fun day out with cousin ya. we just went walking around aimlessly looking for the new mall in orchard till we finally found the orchard cental haha and man, the mall is HUGE... well there are many stories in the mall so yeah.. its tall..

well we didnt really know what we wanted to do, then she remembered she was looking for bags so we went hunting for bags haha, so random rite... so walking around the new mall, found some rather interesting stuff there like erms an indoor rock wall and a ben and jerry's outlet with balcony view of orchard... great place man...

after which we went to watch ice age 3D at cinelesiure haha and well it was a day of first =D first outing with her, first time watching 3D movie then it was also followed by first time eating till forget time hahaha. cause after the movie we went to shokudo to eat which was at the hereen there. we sat there and ate but mostly talk till 1030 from 7 LOL and really, it was like talking nonstop la! first time (again) i talked so much before hahaha =D we cousins really think alike ya!

yeah, after dinner we walked... yes we walked all the way to esplanade and chill out there till the last train. hahaha it was rather fun to go out with my cousin after all these years of not really knowing each other so shall go out some time soon ya! though next time i cant pay everything ya -_-

4B rox my world haha + 55 hours

2009-07-13T23:58:00.002+08:00

haha this block leave certainly was fun though i still have like 2 days left... everytime always like that one, time flies when ppl are having fun huh.

anyway, saturday was a very very good day. went to sentosa to have a day at the beach with 4B peeps and it was also for us to surprise jonathan as it was also his birthday celebration today so yeah HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! haha he so lucky ya to have such a nice girlfriend to organise this for him( yeah, it was his gf that organised the outing LOL ) yeah we did the usual stuff, played around witht the frisbee, volleyball and playing in the water. HOWEVER! there was 3 things that was different this time =p
1) got to see more ppl this time, gordan louis aug and rezza haha so long never see each other already and well its great that things have already been gone and forgotten now, great to be friends again =D
2) well there was free food, kudos to jon again hahaha well actually his gf la... wah lucky man sia
3) well, experience tells me you only see spare tires walking around and only the occasional hourglass... but hmm, wonder whats happening this time yeah. cause there was this italian grp that came to play with us( yeah i asked them where they were from) and there was this really pretty lady with them... maybe its just we were lucky la hor =D shall not say too much lest ppl start slandering me -_-

well after our trip to sentosa, we headed to well marina square for k box... well for me i just went there to hear them sing =D cant sing for nuts... really... thats what most of my friends tell me too >.< hahaha. well at first i was living in denial but i have come to terms with it now =( hahaha but yeah well i at least sung abit... really tiny bit haha... most of the time is see zhiming and junhuang high only hahaha

well its always times with friends that alway make people feel happy =) everytime i go out, its the company that matters and not the things you do... be it watching the movie for another time, sitting down in that k box not singing or just going around... its always the friends that make it all the more worthwhile and interesting =D
although its always the same peeps ( lucas, jiahui, hazel, junhuang, yanni, zhiming ) its always fun to be with them ya

well after that memorial day... it was sunday and well supposed to have plans-_- but then since SOMEONE wasnt free so just went to past yau his birthday gift ya! happy birthday to you too!!!
so, for the day i just slack at home..... well think i went to jui mu house then slack at home... to continue playing
star ocean..... 27 hours... stil disc one
33 hours... disc 2 ler.... gotta chiong....
40 hours.... that was yesterday 3 am.... cannot ler.. just scrape to disc 3... ok fien tank everything ler... just nid to get to the end and find out the freaking story>.< monsters can kill later!!!!
55 hours.... finally... in time to meet hazel for badminton( which was cancelled and turned into a run) i finally finished the story.... BUT WAIT, haha star ocean is famous for having after finishing the game to have a secret dungeon... guess i failed to finish this game this time again... level 80 now.... game review says got until lvl 200++
seriously, i always wanted a long rpg game.... this really takes the cake...

well back to today, also gamed the whole day. then evening suppose to have outing with tango guys but well something came up so cant make it in time... then g meet up for run with hazel/zai combo... well in the end nothing much, turn out i ran alone cause they went swimming hahaha =D better also la, later i become light bulb >.< haha they all so funny... so active can go run together and exercise together... hiaz...............................................................................

well, everything will fade in time.... good times, bad times... even recent ones..... but donno why those close to me also seem to be fading away.... even though i told myself i wont care so much bout this kind of stuff now during pro term.... but losing the bond you had with people just doesnt feel right.... but then again... it may just well be me over thinking things... kinda happens alot, but who knows when is when ya

tml outing with cousin.... hmm think it will be our first outing in our 19 years knowing each other... hahahaha! looking forward to it

ex concrete jungle

2009-07-11T00:31:00.002+08:00

yeah, it was finally the start of our block leave which was adeptly named as ex concrete jungle by avon and me hahaha! kinda stupid but rather interesting nontheless..... before the starting of the exercise, we had a few rather tough training to go through such as the 1x good one we had for route march and then soc... but yeah, tough but still bearable ya.... pain is only temporary after all =p

so starting with day 1 of block leave... supposed to meet up with rachel but well she was sick so we didnt met each other after all..... kinda understand somethings now... its no point for me to dwell on it anymore, but guess its time for me to move on as well now.
So, instead of meeting up.... i played star ocean throughout the day and yes... after 30 plus hours of game play.... i finally made it to disc 2. now thats what i callled a long game HAHAHA. after which i went out to met up with the tango mate where we had dinner and catching up with all the support arms ppl.... though we said it was a tango outing, it turned out to become a section 3 outing and it was still fun nontheless =D went to kaisheng house to majong and YESH!!!! won the game ya hahaha, my first majong complete win hahahahah

then today was day2 of the block leave.... slept through the morning cause was still quite tired then me and me bro brought my mom out to vivo for her first visit to vivo hahaha... yeah i know its quite sad but hey, we are good sons k. got bring mom out one leh hahaha and yeah I TREATED LUNCH.... and it was nice hahaha kinda forgot the resturant name but lunch was ex.... argh! then after which i went to meet up with yakai and sulin! haha both so long never see ler and yeah we had a long talk with one another where i kinda found out that my life so far has been a rather epic one... well based on their view and yeah from what my bro yifeng told me before.... my life seems to be one that is filled with regrets and sorrow and heys guess it was kinda right... but one must still move on despite all of these set back cause who knows what would have happened if something in the past happened in a different manner... things, both good and bad would not have happened in the way now and i would never know what course of action would be the best for myself.... so just BE IT LIVE IT and move on ya =D
hahahaha yeah the peeps are still the same, lets all meet again some time soon hahahaha.

for now, i shall sleep... or else i wont wake up in time for later hahahaha. yeah, this is gonna be one hell of a block leave.... and i'm not wasting it. time is just too short... but hey, who ever said living was easy =p

hiaz...

2009-07-05T19:57:00.002+08:00

well this week has been a rather long week cause well... i was appointed the cpc( cadet platoon commander) for my platoon and i tell you, there is just tonnes of admin work to be done here and there....

well i shall keep this post short cause i'm running out of time already to go book into camp...
there really issnt anything much to talk about this week except for a fact that i feel i'm gonna at least enjoy myself better in pro term cause people are getting better ya....

then booking out, there was the hokkaido food fair now at tampines mall and i tell you, cream manju cake is the best man. lol and i saw remo today oh well random hahahaha

had majong with tkd peeps yesterday as well.... shall talk more when i book out on wed =D

YEAH! BLOCK LEAVE HERE I COME!!!!

a period of change

2009-06-28T12:32:00.002+08:00

this week has been full of events that had been running non stopped.. or so it seems. Hectic was the word to describe the week but there were also many other things that went through my mind as this week went past us in a flash....

this week began with the last 3 days of service term... in which we didnt really had much to do except SEOC, preparation for our 24km route march and our out processing.... guess the main event was most probably our 24km route march which happened in the wee hours between 9pm to 4 am... which was what i would say god damn freaking unearthly hours.... but there were some pros and cons to marching at that time... guess even a normal person would be able to think of them so shall not elab further. But nontheless, the route march was surprisingly easy for all of us, we had become much more combat fit that we had expected ourselves to be and well... the march was draggy but it became fun at one moment of time.... and it was all because of the plt 3 song that i think chiam and nic made up.... the song was really nice and funny to sing, it really reflected the different things that we would most probably rmb each other in the times to come.... and as i was trying to find the tune of the song which they used( it was some old chinese or hokkien song) i found that it was almost impossible to find the song so i shall just try to hum the tune and see if ayone konws the song name... for now, here are the lyric, oh and some stuff here are kinda inside jokes ya

This is the song of platoon 3,
let us start with section 1~~
nicholas is our bloody smoker
alex is our mr relac ah
benett is our aide memior
ah chiam is our party animal
desmond likes to show his teeth
chin chow england not the very good ya
darren likes to HUH? alot ah
nathaniel is our fallout boy
si yan is our ding dong bell
brian is our leopard tank
kia jun is our mr food
marcus looks like a koala bear/ likes to talk alot
avon is our airborne diver
benard is relac no 2
leonard is our CHETOH master/ ahhh DOTS
yi xin always sing out of tune
david is our loo chin chiang / likes to smile alot
hui jie is our spiderman
kenny always kanna molest
marc is our mr quite
DJ is very hardworking
hasbi is our melayu
eugene compass or protractor
seng wei bible always got light
pavneet march like playing drum
chong ling is our pt ic ya
ryan is our tallest man
chun wei likes to swear alot
yu guang is our apoca LIPS
kai sheng long 4 like to tuck in
allen is our fastest runner
gabriel always sweat alot
seth looks like a doctor
fabriz is our deodorant
long zao always ready to strike
zephy always any more keys/is our keypress ic
val where is your magazine/is our blur sotong ah
yuheng likes to play with his SAW ya

let us move on to instructors
let us start with section 1
LTA ray looks like ang moh ah
2LT valen ORD liao
warrant chok is not that old ah
LTA justin drive an SB ya
PC always dont waste time

this is the song of platoon 3 ya
let us rmb each other
BE IT LIVE IT TANGO 3!

and so thats the song bout our platoon... we sung it though most of the 24 km march cause it was long and i felt it was quite nice... remembering all the times ya

and then came wed where everyone knew where they went.... even though we were cold, wet, tired, full of blisters, abrasions in various impt places, everyone were still generally happy cause we were finally graduating to pro term... i was posted to infantry and even though i had the mentality that i was going support arms, i just had to change my thinking all over again....
changes comes as we least knew it would happen.... so now i'm in foxtrot wing now....

entering into the new wing means lots of different new things would come into my way.... for one thing, i personally would like to change... from this pro term onwards, i would be less dependant on ppl anymore, from my stint in service term i know, i always want to talk to ppl when i book out, always depend on other ppl for info during camp, always feel lost....
all these will change, you could say maybe i want to close up abit.... but i guess that might be the best way to describe it now... i know from my past, i'm quite retarded in some sense at socializing... lol dont know how to say.... but yeah... guess i'll try to survive....

being able to think actually is a funny thing, have you ever wondered tha the "you" today is not the "you" yesterday? its like we are all different ppl from yesterday.... with every new input we get from our everyday happenings, we become different.... it just feels so weird, i cant imagine me thinking so deep again lol! one thing is for certain, ppl arent what they seems

well talking more light hearted stuff now, went out yesterday for lan with bro friend and yau.... before that i went to buy hazel's birthday present and zai belated present hahahhaaha HAPPY BIRTHDAY YA! hope both of them stay lovey dovey lol.... everytime see them so musshy one. well brought them oven mittens so they can bake stuff together. then following that went to buuy movie tix for transformer... at 12 for a 820pm show... lol... then acidentally brought exxtra tix >.< lol stupid man... lucky pat was free so called her to fill in ya and well the show was fantastic man... cant wait to watch it next week again. hahaha...

life always so funny... we always want something else, something more... for now,uess its great to be here now and then.

possibly my last book in into ocs

2009-06-21T19:15:00.002+08:00

hiaz... i'm actually more or less sure that i'll be going to support arms now and this could maybe be my last book in back to ocs for the next 6 months... but hey who knows, maybe i'll be wrong haha.

but anyway got kinda mixed feelings bout going to support arms, excitment, trepedition.... oh well lets just see where the force up above want to take me to....

besides the army, i had a long talk with hector today hahaha, its been awhile =D hope you enjoy your stay in ocs ya! hahaha

everyone will face this sort of trouble every now and then. you will neevr know whether your heart is playing with you or not.... it is only when you truly feel down and when you need help, the first one that comes to your mind that will be a good sign that.... well, it might not be just something simple going on inside... things cant be so simple now...

i mean, we are all growing up now =D and thats good and bad.... growing just feels so weird

chiong up knolls, cleaning rifle and finally social night

2009-06-20T21:04:00.002+08:00

and so they say, service term has finally concluded with the end of social night where we guys were suppose to graduate from men to gentlemen -_- by demonstrating to our dates that army has not made us overly caveman yet... lol
but heck it, there is still 24 km route march and seoc so its not entirely over....

This week was definitely eventful, cause there was 2 high profile activities going on which were platoon live firing and social night, both are of the toughest challenge to my life yet... platoon live firing was suppose to be relaxing and fun, get to chiong up knoll and shoot some live rounds..... but then, they had to put me as the runner-_- well ie to say, i got a big signal set behind my back which has absolute no use throughout the mission and i have to do everything with THAT on my back.... this was thus the most PHYSICALLY challenging eventduring service term. i remember that during tekong field camp, i just carried the signal set for 1 km then i went foaming already.... but now,... hehehe =D

still foam... LOL. well but didnt felt so tired out for that long, i only felt damn damn damn x9999 tired on the first afternoon, felt so shag that i couldnt even eat my lunch... then drank water till felt like punking... LOL but after that i kinda got used to the weight so... i level up ler =D haha

moving on to the next challenge in my life, it was social night... first, it is 100% the first time i had to dress until so nice for such an event and well everyone also looked fantastic that night. But the thing is, it was damn funny and awkard that night... the guys had to intro our dates to each other and it was damn weird.... but it was only until the night progressed on that the mood started to lighten up abit... especially during the performanace by one of the guys where he made gestures to the lyrics of the songs and it was absolutely hilarious... really fantastic performance.... then after our wing com left, it was finally declared the " real social night " has begun hahaha the mc was also a very funny guy call zhao jia wei.... kudos to him for being mc.... well overall social night was kinda fun, food was great but little, got to see many beautiful ladies and took many photos even though me and zhen zhen didnt bring any camera hahaha....

oh and on a final note, Thank you zhen zhen very much for being my date for social night! you looked fantastic that night and so sorry if it was kinda boring for you >.<

for now, i'm just waiting for my posting results and the completion of service term.... life just move on and i feel to be a very lucky guy, to have great friends and a good family=D

and so it just came and went

2009-06-15T00:05:00.002+08:00

FINALLY!!!! ITS OVER!!!!
haha after 5 days of tears, sweat and blood, the finale for service term is finally over... but for most of us, it seems so fast. it seemed so unbelievable...
just goes to prove to me that time and just come and then the next moment you say, there it goes...

well, the week was definitely eventful and all i can say was that we ll did well, well done to each and everyone of us in plt 3 for the outfield digging ya...
besides just being shagged out during the field camp, like all field camps, it was a time of inner reflection and understanding myself as a person better. i kinda understood that i have yet to be able to stand on my own two feet and say that i'm ready for tomorrow... i just feel that i'm still not independent enough and i'm not mature enough as a person.... i still have many things i have to do and many other areas to improve upon... haha even as i am reading this i find that what i'm typing is quite random but then, guess thats just what a half awake person would be typing... lol...
hiaz... i shoulnt rush life too much, guess maybe it was just too early for me, i should learn to control my emotions better... i get to fustrated too easily ya =p
like this qoute i remembered " we've learnt to make a living and not a life, we've added years to life but not life to years"
life is a chain of moments of enjoyment and not of survival nor sorrow...

well besides the emo part, i was also very awe inspired this week.... cause i got to see the comms parade of 73/08 i think.... just see the parents rushing down to their son or daugther and putting up the rank for them... it just brings out the tears in myself.... i feel their joy and that is my goal... to reach their moment 6 months later...
o and one interesting thing happened during my time as security force... one newly comm 2lt gave us an ang bao cause we saluted him... on his ang bao he wrote a very good msg to us.
" do not try to impress your instructors when you hold a wing appointment just to gain points from them cause you will just lose more from your peers" i'll remember this.... it is just so true

now, just 2 weeks left to end of service term, life's more or less stable now and kinda used to it ler.... well speaking of 2 weeks left, next week is social night and thank goodness i got my clothing already... well kudos go to the service staff at tampines one the natural project.... man they were damn helpful in giving me advice on what i should wear and what suited me hahaha... will most definitely go there again =D

for now, i shall sleep tight and hope for a better day tml =D

book in and book out

2009-06-07T17:16:00.003+08:00

well... life sucks, why? cause we got book out.... then book in... in less than 24 hours... well in fact its less than 12 hours... so yeah, its a really gun cant cock situation ( well this is a tango plt 3 lingo )

hiaz.... as it turns out, i'm still one of those poor soul that is still worrying bout 19 june... well gonna go from plan A to B then to C and so on..... well for many of the guys here, this is the general layout of what we are gonna do:

1) girl friend ( if have )
2) close friends
3) not so close friends
4) friends siblings/ own siblings
--------------------------------- this is the line of desperation
5) friends of platoon mate ( may come with charges or not)
6) yellow book
7) dating services
8) adult friend finder ????
9) extras/ suicide/ inter date

well i'm real close to that line now.... and my date line is tonight.... die liao la...

well this coming week is scorpion king, its gonna rock and stone man.... in digging i mean....sian

hiaz.... guess life is always filled with a series of trying to find the right choice... but who would ever know that it will be the right choice.... everything just comes down to opportunity huh...

last min ride b4 i go

2009-05-31T17:32:00.002+08:00

well gonna book in real soon ler. sian.... did my appraisal for commander and peers.

made my head spin round and round... why make me think so much.... lol

hiaz... guess tonight's another important night yeah.... i got bout an hour. gonna go ride to that place and see how i feel bout it again.

do you believe that in life, people deserve a second chance?

foaming

2009-05-31T15:23:00.003+08:00

i'm feeling damn bored.... feeling damn sian.... feeling damn lost....

basically in what the common lingo of plt 3 is saying right now....

i'm foaming...

because of... social night... still no date... its getting real stressful.... because of a myriad of reasons

i'll wait... i only have till tonight... for now... gotta get myself to do my stuff

2009-05-31T04:29:00.002+08:00

well its been awhile and today, hmm well more accurately yesterday was a day where i got to enjoy, pull my hair, woke up feeling not being awake, pull up some courage, pull some hair too and stay up really late....

well basically it was a wtf and omfg day...
haha i went out with yau to watch a movie, well we were SUPPOSE to find yijun first at her workplace... but in the end it turns out that she was working afternoon shift at 4 -_- soooo... we basically walked around trying to waste time for awhile -_- nearly wanted to find a cheap teddy bear and name it yijun and tear it apart... LOL hahaha
after our little de tour, we watched terminator salvation... well, it was a fantastic movie, but the ending was kinda dissapointing but no spoilers here, just go watch it...
after which, i was PS by yau... so i basically went walking around by myself awhile while praying for 2 stuff to happen...
one of them didnt come true but at least i did something nice ler =)
the second.... ARGH!!! sian.... 19 june -_- hiaz....
well went home, brought something nice to eat to make myself happier and thought that it ended my day but HEY!

life is full of surprise ya =D
shuli was feeling bored so we went to watch a midnight movie ya. and what better midnight movie to watch but the night at the museum 2 hahahaha. contrary to some ppl, i found this movie to be rather entertaining, very funny, great movie to watch when you are feeling emo yeah...

oh, and i saw my old old friend louis today ya... great to see him and to be finally be able to talk to him again.... long time since the day ya... but guess its ok already... thought i still remember.

Guess time does heal old scars.... even though they will still be there, the pain and the agony behind it could be forgotten.... but in the end, it depends on te heart to be the one that forgives...

2009-05-24T18:25:00.002+08:00

well this weekend has come to an end... and guess it was probably about remembering the past and live for the future.... told myself that field camp would probably change me in some ways... though not sure how but its effect should be in place now... one thing is for certain, field camp made me understand that i look too much back at the past... i miss the past... i miss the times, i miss her, i miss my life... all the past. and i fear the future... i fear of whats to come... but then,

lets just bring it on.

met lots of old faces this weekend... talk bout the past ya
met shuli zhi guan and hua chai when i went to watch movie with bro... ended up being next to them in the cinema LOL
met ryan pang outside cheers and we talked abit
met yau for supper on sat night at hans
walked past octopus with 8 legs but she never see me
walked past siew li but didnt see her until she msg me
met Mr Fahdil haha cant believe he rmb me!! well for your info, he was my PRIMARY 6 tuition teacher... yeah, it was way loong time back and we still rmb each other... gosh... old times yeah.

well gonna eat dinner now and book in abit early to pack field pack... lets just see whats in store for me yea

2009-05-24T00:26:00.002+08:00

I'M FINALLY BACK!!!!! FROM 10 DAYS OF HELL!!!! hahaha lol
well nothing much to talk bout field camp except,
tired shiong and hot....
yeah that basically sums up bout my field camp. for more details i'm sure that when i meet up with you or somehow meet up, i will sure talk bout it one hahaha
well for this whole week in camp.... it was a rather sad period of time for most of us... guess this week really made me reflect bout life and death... bout how fragile life can be and how the person next to you might be there now......
but not there the next day.. nobody would know.... only the higher power upstairs ya.
its not one.. not 2.. but 3 death this week that has affected me... though thay are not directly related to me... one of the cases really came close to my heart.... one of my friend's father passed away recently and well... i know how he feels... life's a bitch ya....

my father passed away in sec 1... then tml.. well today marks the 6th year.... then i just got more bad news...
mom got diagnose with heart problem... makes her susceptible to heart attacks.... hey, life's a real bitch... and this really part of growing up, to see life and death till you become numb to it... if it really is then this is just one screwed up place...

well had dinner with brother today and we talked bout growing up as well... and guess nothing much bout it was good ya....

just a damn emo week... but well, what doesnt kill you just makes you stronger.....

2009-05-10T16:34:00.001+08:00

ho well... guess its about time for me to go for field camp ler....
abit worried and abit excited... cause i feel that fieldcamp would be tough and it would definitely change me yet again... wonder how it would be this time

2009-05-09T23:32:00.002+08:00

today was a rather good day...
went to meet up with my spiritual self
meet up with rachel and jos
meet up with s101 peeps and then went for retail therapy again... hahaha

but more imptly, today was about a day of change...
firstly was what my brother told me... that we became abit more religious and that i have definitely become more tolerant of such stuff ya...
then there was the second change where i got to meet up with rachel again... well was kinda awkard but nevertheless... great to see you again
then the third change... that everyone is growing up ler... we are all working or into army ler... all grow up ler ya...

well, one more day to field camp 10... hiaz.. must stay strong. i will preserve and learn as much as possible...

oh yeah, got to enjoy a nice ribeye steak today at nydc =D

2009-05-09T10:37:00.002+08:00

it is vesak day... and its always good to have holidays hahaha... cause get to book out more mah yeah.

well putting that aside, this week was a wonderful week... cause there was the holy and legendary SIB ( slack in bunk ) haha cause there was re ippt and i didnt need to go =D yeah... besides that, the week was rather dull, there was nothing much interesting that happened during the week... well there was the swine flu fever hahaha

and more good news... i'm going to NUS!!!! business admin ( accountancy ) and computing... oh well not going ntu and not going to appeal, its just a 1 x good one attempt so no point trying next year ya!!

for this week end, I MUST ENJOY MYSELF!!! cause tekong field camp for 10 days next week....

2009-05-03T14:42:00.001+08:00

"Caress the one, the Never-Fading
Rain in your heart - the tears of snow-white sorrow
Caress the one, the hiding amaranth
In a land of the daybreak" -- nightwish Amaranth

just really like this song

2009-05-03T11:26:00.002+08:00

sian.... I RECIEVED NTU LETTER!!!!
well thats what the first reaction would be.... for most ppl, it would be accompanied by joy cause they would have either got into one of their choices.....

for me... disappointment.... i didnt get into acc and biz or acc or biz as single degree....
guess i screwed up my interview badly sia.... the faculty dont wan me bah....

so got into info eng & media and econs.... double degree but for what purpose man....

2009-05-03T04:08:00.003+08:00

today.. well i mean yesterday haha was a great day... cause i got to meet up with the tkd guys and girls yeah always a great bunch of ppl to be with to just have fun haha ( just the occasional squeaking sound ) well we went to marina square, suppose to watch x men but in the end no tix so we ( me, shuli, patrina, yifeng, amir, naadira, samantha, min min and da da combo ) went to just walk walk around... haha went to arcade and played awhile and then walk around somemore....

then hor, samantha didnt want to go home mah and then suggested we go play majong lor.... so in the end come to my house to play majong.... dont wan to talk much... lost everything -_- sian... but still, it was great to play majong again hahahaha. then after our little match, it started to rain and so me, being a nice guy, sent her home lor... well hope everything will be fine for her.

For whatever the case, i believe that we shouldnt get too angry with whatever our parent's do to us... in the end they mean us no harm and just want the best for us... be it just in their eyes only or for some other greater purpose... i believe no parents would want to do harm to their child... some parents might be abit possessive, some might be abit heck care... but in the end, we are still their flesh and blood... they did not raise us for 19++ years just so that we end up in harms way. sometimes, its just the way we communicate with them to bring out our point that we have grown that matters... things can wait... our parents wont be there forever as i understood this some time back... so cherish them.

dont get mad... your time here is limited, why not spend it happily? Talk... just solve your problems by expressing it amiably... no use bottling it up inside yourself.

ps..... triple shot coffee really does the trick..... and gonna book in later ler... sian

2009-05-01T21:58:00.002+08:00

yeah... it was a great/not so good/bad week... haha
great cause we get to book out early
not so good cause it was a rather boring week in some sense... lesson were interesting but i was kinda sick and not sick... aiya in between la so it wasnt a very good week.
bad cause of some other reasons... really... sian. oh well, guess i'll just wait and see again.

the week was a very reflective one, cause we had to do our journals and then i had a long and hard time thinking back oon the stuff that happened throughout my time in tango... i referred back to my own personal journal and read back what i wrote.... and well it kinda makes me wonder, am i alright? maybe i just think too much sometimes ya... guess its always like that, i read too deep that i just miss out the whole point of thing... Hey, life is great, there's always time to stop and chill out... i should just take my time... like what one of the videos that was shown in the clm periood said " drink slowly, eat slowly, walk slowly, read slowly..." and erms " kiss slowly " lol live life slwoly and enjoy... i'm settled, i'll just live life as it comes by.

today was a sian day cause it was just slack at home... then all of a sudden sufandy msg me saying he is going back to indo for good ler...... felt really damn sad, asked him which terminal he said he was taking a ferry.... so couldnt rush to send him off... hope you see this so TAKE CARE YA!!!! dont forget us man, will still rmb you as chin gay ya!!!! hahaha

and just like that, one of my friend has left.... when ppl leave, it always reminds me of the day when dad left... .kinda emo but just reminds me of how impt things are in life.... cherish everything and everyone... no matter what, its not a coincidence that we met.

2009-04-26T08:27:00.002+08:00

well its a bright sun shiny sunday.... and though i'm feeling better, i'm still feeling slightly light headed... probably due to the beer last night ya -_-.... and i'm still gonna go cycling after this hahaha.... go to my favourite spot later to sit down and chill out later....

haha but putting that aside, this week was a rather interesting week and i could probably sum it up with one phrase... dont underestimate your mind.... there were many instances in this week that proved to me that my physical condition was never the limit.... be it the long lectures we had to endure without much sleep, the long endurance runs, the hardcore rt training ( and it was my last ), the extremely dry signal lessons and the IPPT.... yes, the body, the lack of sleep are not the limits... is the state of mind that will determine the outcome... btw, i finally got my 25/25 GOLD for IPPT =D

however... i'm not satisfied... there was this entry i wrote in my book during the long breaks in signal institute " I find that i lack endurace, I need the motivation which i lost long time back.... even though i got my ippt gold ( which encompassed no rt and 200 bucks) I know that i'm not at my best. I heard wbout some other rt guys who improved from 10.15 to 9.15... I kow that i can improve and do better. maybe it was just that i was sick or maybe i'm just finding an excuse... but i will strive to run below 9... by the end of this course or the end of service term if possible..." and thats what i wil try to achieve....

besides this issue on physical fittness this whole week... there was also this issue on social night... haha well at least i got date loh! thx =D cause if not will get to sign extra one leh..... and if any girls wanna hook up with some guys can ask me ya... got ppl need dates too....

well... the more i see.... the more i think... the less i know. is this always the case? the more i debate... the more i care and dwell upon it... the more ridiculious it seems to me.... hahaha guess it really is not a good time now...

busy ppl always seem to have more time... cause we make full use of it... for one, i'lll always make time for family and friends ya =D

2009-04-19T17:47:00.002+08:00

oh well same old story again.. gonna book in soon ler.... haha but something good happened today... went to eat the manhattan fish with my cousin and family today... haha its always good to go eat with my da jie and yeah we all talked alot about our family and my mom started talking bout my past which most of it i cant rmb... hahaha.... most of it is quite embarassing so shall not say more...

more imptly... it just made me realise... people in general always like to talk about the past ya... always comparing and remembering about our past... we seem to live by it, our present is shaped by it.... and we guide our actions based on the past... wonder when can we live by looking ahead...

2009-04-19T00:52:00.003+08:00

finally booked out from camp... but in less then 24 hrs i will have to be back there -_- sian.... well actually thinking bout it now, tango aint that bad.... but training is getting tougher now. However, i wont blog much bout army, you wan to know more can just come and ask me bout it.... to be brief.
50 counts of 4 jumping jacks... x3
30 counts of 4 alternate leg thrust... x3
30 counts of push ups... x3
30 counts of 4 dips... x3
30 counts of 4 crunches... x3
then everything above x2....
our 1 circuit training........

yeah putting this aside... something really interesting happened in camp... well there is this guy his name damn cool, he's caled zephy and well we talked awhile in camp and we shared a very different opinion on people... its really interesting as both are very contradicting view on how different people view things...
ok.. my point of view is that everyone has their own right... cause everyone just want to do things that is comfortable for them, that is right to them... in a sense it aint wrong cause its just what you want to do... but how other people view the way you do thigns is another story altogether... take for eg those people who like to blast music in buses... they are not wrong nor they are bad people just by doing that what... its just what they like... though irritating but its just who they are... its always because of social norms that allow us to pass judgement on others...

well then zephy view people as selfish beings.... we are all born view the need to satify our own needs before others.... greed, desire and lust etc etc.... thats why we are all ugly.... but it is also a known fact that we are also born with a conscious.... this then allows us to decide in a rational manner to do things and thus we arent that all bad as well....

2 very different way of viewing things and it could be quite extreme... its always up to you to decide how you wanna see things ya... and personally, i like my positive way =D

gotta stay positive and motivated in life.... as things are going now... i'll just play by stander until my time...

just miss the times back then... all those times... and i really mean all

2009-04-12T18:55:00.002+08:00

oh well.. gonna book in now ler.... today was... well a boring day... stayed at home and pack my stuff.. haha

well guess this is it.... haha finally got my resolve!!!! go go yu heng!!! gotta finish my ocs first!!!!

2009-04-11T23:30:00.003+08:00

days are often filled with ups and downs....

today, went to send yau off to tekong.. well i only sent him to pasir ris b4 he left on the bus hahaha... looking back, tekong really is a nice place to be... made really good friends there well can say brothers haha...
shortly after that i went to pasir ris park to emo.... NOT! haha went there with 5 1.5l bottles to fill with sand to bring to camp... pls dont ask why, i also donno LOL

after that, i just went back home to prepare to go to camp... thats when the rollercoster trip started going down..... cause, i was nearly late... had to rush all my stuff, pack all my extra civilian clothing =( which unfortunately was wasted cause didnt used it in the end..... then i caught the cab and told the uncle i was gonna be late.... then, wah tell you the uncle damn zai... drove fast but still safe hahaha =D reached camp on time yeah! but had cold sweat most of the time there cause very often it looks liked there was gonna be a jam....

then reached camp for rt.... well simply put it rt was
TIRING
but fun la..... in some sense.... i mean running with field pack? 300 sit ups? cant be that fun mah.... hiaz....

but the thing bout the rt was that it made me real late..... hiaz suppose to go meet up with "mom" for dinner one but then late... oh well next time then....
so in the end i went to suntec by myself to get some stuffs... went to my usual shops to get some cards =D ( yeah retail therapy) and there was this sales staff who was very nice and helpful then while helping me get my cards, we talked abit and i found out he was enlisting soon haha... told him more bout army and he help intro me to more stuff round the shop haha... great guy and good sales staff there =D

think i finally understood myself abit more ler... had a real nice talk with my family today while eating durian =p and well yeah... self reflection... i know what i have to do now ler...

2009-04-11T09:37:00.002+08:00

well its great to finally be out again.. its day 2 of book out and i gotta go back to camp for awhile later for remedial training -_- and its just cause i didnt get ippt gold.... hiaz...
well putting that aside, for the 3 weeks that i was out of contact with the world, there seems to be alot of stuff that has changed... haha well actually not much but tampines one is up and it is really nice.. got lots of interesting shops there yeah... but too bad pay havent come yet...

sooo... my good friday yesterday was spent just walking around haha... first, my family and i went to the crematorium to pay respect to my father and grandfather... nothing much i wanna say bout that... then after that went out with the tkd guys to watch 2 fast 2 furious... nice show man.. hahaha its always nice to be with the tkd guys ya... =D

THEN!!! I GOT A NEW PHONE!!! finalyl i can say good bye to the old sucky phone that lags like mad! hahahaha Retail therapy rox!!!!

haha well guess i really just like to go out and hang out with friends everytime i book out... but more imptly, for the past 2 years or so, i've been neglecting my family alot... thats what my mom told me yesterday.. and now well... cause i've been more free in a sense now, its always nice to bring my mom around hahaha..

gotta be more independant now... thats just part of growing up ya... and guess some problems are better kept to myself.... haha... well.. life's just giving me a rollercoster ride now...

OH and thx to hazel for the cookies and yau for my birthday present =D hahaha but no birthday cake this year =( oh well..

btw, good luck to all those enlisting this week!!! tekong is gonna be fun, trust me

2009-04-10T00:43:00.004+08:00

woo hoo!!! first book out after 3 weeks of confinement.... well there is lots to say but not really keen on mentioning them haha....
lets just say the 3 weeks was really eventful and kinda reflective on myself as a person... cause i have one bunk to myself now so i'm sleeping and doing most of the stuff by myself... haha independence ya...

nothing much i wanna say now cause everyday cause yeah... something bad kinda happened which actually issnt that bad but i didnt wan it to happened in this manner... o well time will make it pass.... i hoped..

just wanna say... friends and family are impt... and though 1 week late... happy birthday to myself =D i'm finally 19

2009-03-22T21:46:00.003+08:00

well... the last post b4 i sleep and then off to the next phase of my army life.....

nothing much to say except that life has been full of surprises.... both ups and downs...

i'll just say, bring it on....

here i come ocs...
there i go... byes to my friends, family... my loved ones... at least for the next 3 weeks ya haha...

thx to all for their support thus far... wont let you all down de

2009-03-22T16:52:00.004+08:00

memories.... it was a old folder i found in my laptop.... looking at it and then at everything around me... just made me feel kinda lost and emo...

regret or maybe its just the time..... guess i'm just abit slow and it is only now that i feel that my heart still beats for you....

but i know that its too late already.... there's nothing i can do and there's no turning back time...

and i know... its probably the best and the worst thing i did in my life.... haha guess i'll just laugh and cry it out.....

gotta settle myself down before entering army again....

but still, if given a chance... i'll want to say to you that i'm really sry and i loved you and guess you are gone now...

2009-03-21T21:11:00.002+08:00

Its always a great occasion to meet up with old friends again... met up with tuition friends yesterday haha and that was with yau and yijun haha... well it was a long time since i last saw them and we went out to talk and catch up with one another haha.
well it was great to talk with everyone again, yijun still the same haha cute, quite and always smiling haha but abit blur ah hahaha. then yau, yeah haha going army soon man haha good luck.

then after going out with them, went to meet up with class ppl and had dinner... well in the end we had subway -_- and it was half ate at the subway while the rest of us ( raj, me, zhikang, wei jie) wanted to eat at esplanade.... so after they finished eating we went to esplanade and yeah, we drank and ate and talk hahaha... drinking was courtesy of raj who brought wiskey hahaha... zhi kang very fast going to knock out ler then I volunteered to help wei jie drink too hahaha... well it was kinda nice to drink...

lets just say i could also drown my sorrow with it as well haha....

after which i tried it plain without diluting and well it was good.... but the opinion on it was different with zhen zhen haha, who ask her to drink like that lol... then, we went to my house and on the way there, me and raj had a little show to perform to the girls hahaha, raj is a good actor.. being drunk hahaha.

well then at my house... nothing much to say except for there was tonnes of things going on.... well, in a different sense... me and raj had to send zhen home at 1 ++ but well it kinda turned out to be emo session hahaha....

well dont be afraid to show your softer side.... constantly showing a strong front does not help you to solve things yeah... well it also means that you value others opinion more now mah =D... so all the best ya.

full of conflict and emotions.... sometimes its always better to oepn up to others for help... no one can solve everything alone.... we live in a world that depend on interdependance after all.....

but still, i still have the choice... its still difficult to ask for help after all....

2009-03-20T00:17:00.002+08:00

yeah i'm beat hahaha... today was an eventful day haha wen out with the tkd ppl and omg, i'm shocked.... haha love can do wonders sia.... make our man become girl liao sia haha... haha well change for hte better is always good in any case hahaha... nevertheless, still shocked at how huimin change hahaa...

after watching dmc with them, haha funny movie, went to city hall to meet up with the j coy pt 1 guys haha... yeah imagine one big group of botak come storming into your shop haha but well we are all nice guys.... went to fish and co and crapped alot man great ppl they are...

oh and i ate the swordfish thingy.... not gonna eat it anytime soon... eat ler very gerlat.... oily... alot... but nice... if it was shared with someone then it would have been just nice yeah... after which we went for lan hahaha wah nice man so long never play ler... 8 v 8 cs nice man haha thoughi was quite noob but yeah, still can kill haha... so left early cause tml would also be another eventful day but will sure miss the guys man... everyone, well almost everyone is great haha.

well gotta get up in 4 hrs to send mom, clean the house and go out yeah ahahaha... cant wait to see old friends ya.....

company of friends will just let you forget all your troubles man... yeah.

2009-03-18T21:43:00.002+08:00

well.... its simple... sick then sian = my morning

haha but i made up for it by going for an evening cycle yeah... just going back on my bike brings back memories of those times man... used to cycle with tk or kwok... well i cycled to pasir ris and then went to the spot we used to sit down and chit chat hahaha.... was feeling kinda restricted and down these few days but then after the ride and then sitting down there, it just made me feel very calm and composed... reflecting on my past and then on all my toubles and thoughts at hand... haha, well it just felt great... to sweat then to feel the sea breeze...

i'll just take my troubles one at a time and dont think too much, just take it as it comes...

oh yeah, go out and dont come back with extra or else got prob liao

2009-03-18T01:26:00.000+08:00

man.. woke up coughing like shit.... argh... feeling damn sick....sian...

2009-03-17T20:21:00.003+08:00

well, woke up today feeling abit better... at least i can walk now. Not like yesterday where i really had to yank myself out of the chair to walk.... but, was feeling sian again cause there was suppose to be an outing today but well i cancelled it cause so little people could come.... oh well next time then. Though i dont know when it will be... it'll probably be a long time from now cause this is the last long leave that we gus have and the girls are going into uni soon so yups... guess i kinda agree with what liyi said then...
on another note, went out with my cousin and nephew and brother today.. .cause they wanna celebrate haha, cause of my results mah. well we went to the sakae sushi at pasir ris and had the 60 min buffet... lol... yeah stuff yourself silly within 60 mins yeah.... haha then by late afternoon, headed back home to rot again hahaha... well i would call it "rest" for now...
back home, recieved word from edmund that trip tml is cancelled.... sian -_-... now i dont know whether i should go there in the evening anot... well shall ask others see lor... so my day has been freed by cancellation again... hope this does not happen on thurs....
so, i'm gonna go running tml morning cause... my foot will most likely be ok liao... and i gotta make up for lost training.... but dont know whether to run to pasir ris or to bedok reservior..... oh well, let see where my mood bring me tml... anyone interested just msg me haha.

haha, guess times are bad ya, lets just see how things turn out.... life's just full of ups and downs and tonnes of surprises ya =D

2009-03-16T12:01:00.003+08:00

sain... woke up with my body feeling like shit.... whole body aching like mad and my feet.... wah think i nid wheel chair... blisters like siao...
any kind soul out there willing to help me get breakfast? lol
there was another reason why i was feeling shit this morning... had 2 really weird dreams last night... one was about booking in and i forgot to bring my fieldpack, lbv and helmet back to camp... wah that one was damn screwed-_-
two, was actually a really nice dream..... kind of like a guys fantasy... but, it just makes me wonder... then yeah... blah blah think think sian sian.... hiaz.... not good to think so much, but then again, there is also another side of the coin...
however, my heart was still feeling contended depsite the leg pain, brain pain, back pain, right thumb pain, right ankle sore, left forearm pain.... yeah haha, pain is good.... LOL
for now... nid to hop or crawl my way to the kitchen... no one home ( as usual ) and i cant go out unless some kind soul come and help me... oh well.. gotta make breakfast

2009-03-16T00:20:00.003+08:00

went to nus open house today... well it wasnt bad at all... kinda changed my views on nus haha... however, this is not good as well cause effective till yesterday, i was dead set on going to ntu... then i kinda changed my mind today cause there was this course that caught my eyes.... the double degree programme for accountancy and communication studies.... omg its like hey, thats not bad at all sia and weh i inquired more from the student ambassadors, it has its good and bads compared to ntu but i'm not so sure now.... gotta seek more advice tml ya....
well putting serious stuff aside, went with shuli and petrina again today.... someone commented that both of us were like her bodyguard sia hahaha... then saw the same group of ppl which i saw yesterday at ntu sia haha.... small world sia... well it seems that alot of ppl are using the phrase " we'll meet if we are fated to meet" haha guess everyone is fated to meet now... LOL
Oh, shuli and me cant stop eating sia today lol.... cause we are growing more now hahaha... every break from the talks we confirm go buy food sia lol...
after the talks, we went back to bedok to go for training... on our way we saw the octopus with 8 legs LOL haha... shocked sia, almost couldnt recognise her liao... then we all talk awhile and then we finally got off at bedok to go training.... guess time flies real fast and you are catching up with old friends sia hahaha...
training.... shoik sia... really really fun to be back at training... got to see sir and friends again.. kick like mad.... talk some more then kick like mad somemore... feels great man.
Then, got to spar hahaha lol, so long never train then got to spar sia... but fun la, i had to spar 3 times, first was with one brown belt which we kinda had light contact with la... so quite slack haha good warm up... next was with another brown belt and i must say he was feirce sia... but no aim and just chiong at me.... since he anyhow come towards me i just more forward lor... then ended up making him fall like 2 times and nearly kicked his face once...
third time was FUN, three way free for all... wah that one nothing to say but adrenaline rush sia hahaha your friend will suddenly turn into your enemy but yeah it was cool shit =D even our sir got nothing to say = good spar....

haha, tkd was fun guess its still one of my passion even though many times i thought of quiting.... i still enjoy the art and guess i'll still carry one despite all the blisters and sores i got today haha...

the trip today also made me think more bout what i wanna get out of life again... haha even tkd made me reflect more and it also made me think about how i feel bout every individual... well maybe i'm still young hahaha comapred to the sir and btw, gotta thank sirs for the great advice they gave... all of the tkd ppl are good people haha... shu li too man, can become talk cock buddy liao hahaha

tml i shall settle all the academic stuff, hopefully ya....
and well, things just happen la, if you just try to open your mind and heart to understand how others feel, then all is well =D... everyone has their goals... but its those that put others before self thats always worthwhile.... so i guess lets just chill ya ~~~~

btw, here are some crap vid for you ppl to see and laugh yourself silly

2009-03-14T23:44:00.003+08:00

well i'm beat... just came back from ntu open house and though it was suppose to be a tkd outing, it turned out to be a me, shuli and petrina outing, followed by a with her class outing hahaha.
well the talks were quite insightful( some ) and there was one talk, the communication talks, which me and shuli were kanna arrowed to become his examples..... shall elab no further -_-
nevertheless, i'm more or less dead set on where i wan to go now... ntu yeah... filled with nice______, stuff haha you fill in the blanks
oh and something really funny happened, we saw mr max today while waiting for the free shuttle service... and then one of those student ambassador came to help us with direction and information... when we were done with him, he went onto mr max.... boy that was funny.... he asked whether he needed any help and Him can still ask for directions.... stupid...

well, saw lots of ppl today and well, seeing ppl is always interesting hahaha in ways more then one... well especially for shu li today lol... ask him if you wan, shall say no more...

Me and shu li also had alot of time to talk together today man... great to always talk our hearts out together=) i mean well its been awhile since we had good time to chat.... it was something related to 3 things : wrong signals, misconception and girls... yeah well you can piece them up together in any manner you like.... but well as guys, we never know what the opposite sex is always thinking.... just take life as it goes then=) after all, there is still a long way to go dont rush it man.... just take it at the right time ya

2009-03-13T21:34:00.002+08:00

hmm day 2. or more appropriately night 2 after pop.... and i think my body is getting abit screwed up... breakfast was at 11.30 then lunch was at 5.00 and dinner was just done.... haha guess everything was pushed back cause i woke up late.... sian
hiaz... though this is suppose to be a "holiday" i still cant slack off.. gotta run tml morning and keep my fitness level up haha. besides that, i just hope that my sore throat gets well soon... cause i brought Tim Tam just now =)
for those who dont know, its a really nice biscuit... to be dipped in milo in a special way which my friend, Andrew, taught us in army.... hahha really a life changing experience... its a knowledge that has to be spread to everyone..... well when i get the chance i'll show you guys haha...
today was another bored and moodless day... spent the whole day at home haha...
its this kind of days, home alone, raining, bored, that i really dislike... it makes my mind think too much... then all sorts of stuff just start coming out... making me reflect on stuff and emo but there were also reflection on happy times ya.... haha shall elaborate no further.

just realised its the friday of thirteen.... kinda believe now that it really is an unlucky day
oh well.... life just carry on.. i'll see how it turns out

going ntu tml... see see bah haha though see what to see... shuli wanna see girls hahaha.. you get my point

POP photos

2009-03-13T10:04:00.003+08:00

haha well my mom and "mom" didnt take much photos but here they are:

me and zhen zhen, my friend/mom not my younger sister-_-

me and jian hong, fellow jc class mate and coy mate

mom putting my jockey cap for me haha guess i'm getting taller

jian hong and zhen zhen, we are all jc class mates =D

mom getting ready

haha for more photos, go to my friendster.... yes, i finally started using it hahah

2009-03-13T01:18:00.002+08:00

finally, day 1 of block leave... hmm well not exactly cause it just ended an hour ago but let not mind the minor detail....
haha my poor blog, i have been away for a long long time due to many reasons but the point is i'm finally back =)
for good or bad i wont know, only time will tell....
for a time span of 1 year++ i'm sure that it would be a wonderful experience for me to try and recall all those little details and try to spill them out here as much and as vivid as i can =)
but i will not =(
cause it will probably take me longer to just try to remember all the stuff i did.... nevertheless i'll try my best though it'll make me sound very old

ahhh.... looking back now, school life feels great... get to see all your friends, move slowly and sleep anywhere also can... it was just very leisurely. you have the power to do things at your own pace. you get the freedom. Unfortunately, at that point of time none of us( guys) had apperciate our life back then.... hiaz.... but well who would... it just sad that at that point in time, we dont care... its only when you experience something worst, something else that breaks your comfort zone, an external stress, that you will start to regret and cherish what you had....
when you are hot, you wish for it to be cold....
when you are bored, you wish to be busy..... hiazzz

well that was a random start... but jc life was definately fun and rough and tough... it felt like it ended just not too far back and then enlistment date was just round the corner.... oh ya rmb all the gatherings that i had before enlistment.... all the etc etc gatherings hahaha... good times those were.... then there was the double chalet HAHAHA tkd and 4B chalet wah that was a rush for me man... its those fun times that i really miss the most now....

but well, now enters my bmtc life (basic military training centre). Well i cant say much here cause i also donno what can be said and what shouldnt be said... for most people, they will just dread army life, that includes me as well.... but, what i did was to try my best in everything that i did ans to make full use of my bmtc life... i didnt want to just waste my life away in army... so i worked hard and push myself as hard as i could then... for the first time, i saw what i thought was my limits back them and broke through them.... one notable achivement of mine was my 2.4... never once in my life did i smell a under 10min timing for 2.4 before and then the first time i ran in tekong, my timing was 11.55 but then by the 2nd time it was 10.30 =) i just pushed myself and told myself not to stop and never give up... all these manifested in my last 2.4 which was clocked at 9.42min and i got my ippt gold=) haha it was a great sense of satisfaction for me then.... there was also the field camp.... one word, "tough" haha but guess it made me a very positive person cause ya, refer to the above stuff that i said.... well the last notable thing about tekong itself is its beautiful night sky... unlike sg, tekong is dark... there are no lights to interfer at night and you can see all the stars =) really something that stands out in my memories of tekong......

well, 24km route march ended with our pop just a day ago and i must say, i will miss all my army buddies... granted that my bed buddy's a COCK haha =D he'll understand and my mirror buddy is the most famous recuit, or maybe on par with another certain individual.... i definately had a memorable experience in tekong... one that would be etched in my mind forever... btw, my leg has been blister free even after all those marches =D hahahaha

for now, that will be my recap..... life's all above overcoming the rough road in this journey... so i'll take it one step at a time and move on stronger and better with each step.... leaving behind only the foot prints in life....

well there are more stuff that i want to say but just cant get it out of my chest( for this case its fingers) but i'll just say that i'm lost and moodless yet again.... guess its my best friend time that will help me slove my probs again....

2009-03-07T08:12:00.002+08:00

Well, its been 2 years since i last blogged....
many things have happened and i dont have much time to talk bout all of them now...
guess i'll wait till my block leave which is coming soon then i'l have more time to update...

till then, this is just a short post to say, i' coming back and life's just like that...

2007-10-15T20:26:00.000+08:00

well, bad things just keep coming... i just attended my third funeral this year.... it was for my grandmother.

well i'm not as troubled as many people would think... but i'm just sad for other things.

haha, anyways just found out today that they also use electric guitars for funerals too... lol

Its really is just a very unthinkable thing.... it is time for them to go.... it would be best just to let them go in peace and that we would just feel sad that they have to leave.... but from what i have observed.... this is often not the case...

people would feel sorrow... because they could not forgive themselves for not cherishing the deceased but only realizing their importance after they have passed on. It is just so stupid... if everyone knew how to cherished what they have now.... then there would no longer be such sadness anymore.... i mean hey, dont regret when it is what you should have

2007-10-13T12:31:00.001+08:00

today is just a shit day....

i dont wanna say much...

just that no one would understand...

and no one would want to let me do what i want anymore...

i'm stuck... with no one to save me...

today was just the last straw.

2007-10-11T19:25:00.000+08:00

another long long post.

so unfortunate that everytime i blog, its always about bad things.

well maybe i should lighten up my blog abit. I did pretty well for my promos(relative to my class) but really really very well (relative to my school). haha not to brag but just to comfort myself.
Chinese A
GP D
Maths A
Phy A
Chem B
Econ C

yup, total tally. But the bottom line is, its just how much you studied and remember. Its not really how much or how clever you are, though it may play apart.

now, i just feel really down, though not as bad as i have been through even worst. My grandmother just passed away......

it has had a deep impact on me, but i'm not really close with her. What i'm really sad is for my mom. Even though i'm still in school now, i know that she is crying at home and that she is deeply hurt. Even though she is not her real mother, my grandmother had adopted her and raised her to be a wonderful mother and this is no doubt, my grandmother is a wonderful person.

Its just sadden me so much. But life has to move on....

2007-10-01T13:26:00.000+08:00

well well well.... i'm back!!! from the depths of hell called exams... haha

well now that i have a short break, i thought that i'll blog for awhile. well, even though its a short holiday now, it might had been the best if things didnt turn out this way. But never the less, it was for the best.

more things have been left unsaid, but they are all for the best.
it isnt meant for sorrow, it is just an answer.
it is just an answer to all my unanswered promises... though it may have been forgotten. guess it was still for the best.

i'll have to live with it =D guess its better for me too. Please dont cry when you read this, its not meant for sadness, it just my way of expressing all the ....... ya.

time to be free, yet time it wasnt meant to be.
It might have been better if i was busy with things....
then to be left and wait for the things that i dreamed.

after all, i cant mixed my dreams from the reality.

time to catch up i guess, with what that should have caught up a long time ago.
guess i'm getting abit slow then.

2007-09-15T15:15:00.000+08:00

its been long time.... but time hasnt been very nice to me this past few weeks or so anyway....
well been busy mugging and mugging.... i mean come on la.... promos is the biggest shit in our( JC student ) life now.... its >.< .....

life's been shit for all other reason.... but yup, always look on the bright side of life~~~~~
ahhh..... anyway cant talk much here.... i've learnt that sometimes... its better to keep quite and just let everything flow past you.... even if you speak, people might just not get you.....

been thinking alot lately.... .like how things really are.... and how did they came to be...
all those weird weird why questions just keep coming out of my head and well.....

guess i'm thinking too much..... and great!!!! its un understandable...... lets just bury my sorrows with books shall I...

after all, life's just shit now without any support from anyone..... hahaha but guess i cant say that can I.... GP student mah.... its always just an extent... wonder how much...

2007-08-05T23:08:00.000+08:00

life is crazy... and it is going to become worst.... all the merrier i guess....
one moment in life you can be happy... the other moment sad and anguish...ahhh life is so unpredictable... its always best to turn moments of sadness to something it was not meant to be.... got to have tolerance and wits to outplay and outdo it =).... haha sounds like survivor....
WHICH is very very true.... we are living to survive each and everyday of our life.... whether you noticed it or not... even at this very moment, you are fighting for you very life!
lol ok cut the last line cause its b***s//t haha.... i wonder though..... but well today was really one funny day.... filled with sh*t.... =D
morning, pw group leader ( due to confidentiality name is disclosed ) smsed me and said she sh*t until cant walk..... LOL
later in the afternoon, saw my bro and 2 of his friends go MAD.... tell you, 45 pieces of kfc chicken is no joke..... i have therefore concluded that my brother is not human... but a cookie monster relative in disguise.... i mean, 3 pieces and i gave up already you know.....
then eventually one by one they fell to the great tide of oil and crunchy skin crisps..... their jaws gave way and the bowel rumbling as if the perfect storm was here, dark clouds soon gathered overhead and then..... the bombs were let lose... and oMG pray that toilet bowls had no conscious.
worst of all, there was round 2......

then at night, it was a tussle with conscious.... wasnt really the most pleasant but it was none the less enjoyable =)..... of course haha, but really got to devote more time to work ler... cant make it affect your studies..... maybe i'm just too naggy.... but i'm working on it.... i will change and i will endure.... (haha freebird for me)
i just ask for abit of hope(not to give up on yourself) and optimism(dont always say your dumb) from you..... is it really too much to ask?

empty promises are nought to bear,
but yet they appear here and there,
fulfill those things that i will share,
hope you will not throw me with another dare.

has no relevance.... but yet hope the humor is brought across..... haha... random =D

2007-07-27T20:07:00.001+08:00

Its been a real..... bad week.... bad just keeps happening and then they always seem to be about the same thing....

but thankfully, things are starting to clear up now and hope that it will be better from now on....

ever since the term started, everyone's been so busy and hectic.... but just to let you know, i'll always have time for you one so dont worry ok =)...

anyway hope you like your book... dont worry bout the price, it would have failed its purpose if it just made you feel guilty bout it... dont think about buying anything ex for me too though.... if you did it would make me feel bad because it would seem to me that the cost is the most important thing.... but its the thought that counts....
nothing expensive is needed..... i just wan to be with you and see you smile... hope you get the hint of wat i wan now =D

2007-07-23T20:04:00.000+08:00

raindrops keep falling on my head... keep falling on my head....

hiaz.... today it started off...

with econ tutorial... not very good...

then there was another econ make up during pw cause my teacher wasnt here.... it was still fine

so we rushed to go do WR ( supposedly ) but then the laptop hanged.... ok... not that bad

so we ended up not doing anything.... fine

then i went up to meet up with the tkd ppl... and i saw your msg that you were not coming back to sch....so i wont see you.... ok.....

called you but no response ..... happens lots of time so nvm....

then when i called back, think you were too busy too donno wat you all did....... it was all fine....

untill the last byebye.... then it all sank.... ok fine just had my hopes of going home with you crashed only =|
since there will still be tml.....
and then the day after
and the day after....
and the day after...
and the day after..
and the day after.

but i just cant be back to my normal self during tkd today...... ok just for today so no big deal...

then it ended and my bro called.... cant hear me and i shouted to the phone.... tension...

reached tamp and it was raining.... so thats where the rain came in.. perfect

reached home and my window wasnt close even though the WHOLE family was at home.... WOW so it isnt just me who/which is wet after all....

not i'm in front of the com.... wet with the fan blowing..... really wish i cant go sch tml.......

but i just cant feel the cold.

guess i didnt showed enough..... how much you meant to me that even this.....
maybe its just me now

2007-07-21T23:43:00.001+08:00

Guess i really really sucked at it.....

The w_____g game.........

Really cant stand it and it’s really my fault....

Don’t mind me, its just me bitching about and being emo nemo

2007-07-21T08:15:00.000+08:00

its been a long long time since i last blog and unfortunately.... its been due to a series of unfortunate events.... nothing nice has been happening to me this past week and with the future ever so cloudy in front of me, i'm even more unsure of the path i should take now....

Why did all these things happen to me.....
Why did i faint all of a sudden and even the doctors dont know the reasons
Why did i start to think all those stuff when i knew they were all so unnecessary
Why did i feel so affected with things that are happening all around me
Why did i feel a change in mood here and there
Why do i feel that nothing was ever going to remain the same
Why do i not understand anything anymore
Why do i want to say but i know i cant say

i cant answer all these questions.... could it be that i'm dumb? after the hit on my head? argh.....

i just feel that i might be too self centered... to over complacent and that i dont treasure the things i have around me anymore.... i might be too overbearing, wanting to do this and wanting to do that.... but when i dont get it i feel at lost..... guess it must be this sense of lost i'm feeling...
and i know i've got to change it.... i'll change cause i know its the best... but sometimes i feel.... i'm really really tired but i'll still carry on for the reason everyone knows best

2007-07-11T21:26:00.000+08:00

so marks the end of the post mortem of our mid years.... well i did fairly ok although i felt that my maths sucked.... hiazzzz under perform ler... yup but since its just the mid years, shall not sweat the small stuff ya...
so here's my grades = GP got D
Chinese got B
PHY got D
MATH got D
CHEM got E
ECON got U
haha failed econs and got 3 Ds la... not too bad, just have to aim higher now for the promos then...
" you all 101 must perform better one " thats what all the teachers alway says. now all of them are putting more and more stress on us to perform better and to get the As... passing doesnt seem to be enough for us now and that we are suppose to be the cream of the crop...
it doesnt mean that even if we did well compared to the cohort means we are good already... they expect us to get A and nothing else, dont get = no good.....

hiax wat to do? do better lor haha.... =D

ahhh besides the exam.... think its happening back to me again... pms bah.. i'm trying very hard to hold it down and keep it inside of me... but if it so happens to come out of me again. dont worry, just got to give me a few days to forgive and forget....
it might be just me.... i've always moved so fast and now i have to slow down and....... wait for things.... maybe its just my temper.... its not always your fault so dont always blame yourself

who knows? it might well be me after all

gotta make it more clear so i've edited my blog

2007-07-08T20:22:00.000+08:00

ARLO ppl, long time no see ler... haha been busy with well... midyears and tonnes of stuff.. so yup now got a bit of free time so can blog for awhile...
lets see, well midyears wasnt that bad as i expected... was fortunate enough not to fail anything so
far and got fairly good results though not fantastic la... haha cant expect so much rite? the higher you wan to climb, the harder the fall will be if you fail...
so its best to bear in mind to aim for the best but to be prepared for the fall in between though....
understand your ability and then set realistic goals.... not too high and not too low... just enough to do better then you can....
yup, humor can sometimes be the best medicine to relieve stress from studying and to distract your mind away from the burden at hand... thats what i've concluded from studying too much...
you see, i think when you are too stress, you cant really concentrate and will go like " omg omg omg ahhhhhh SHIT " etc etc... then nothing will go in your head when you study. stress is good... too much is BAD... sometimes its best to just relax and start fresh again dont you think?
.... so haha, optimistc... but sometimes i feel, i may be insensitive to such stuff.... its like as though i'm the only happy one when others are feeling sad and i could not possibly comprehend their sadness.... wat should i do?

anyway... no ultimate grades ( U ) or super grades so far ( S )
chem got extraordinaire grade ( E )
phy got D
chinese got B

others havent gwet back yet.....

so yup.... stay tuned and find out haha..

dont worry, i'm always there =)

2007-06-23T20:28:00.000+08:00

hiazzz...... its just 2 days left and i cant wait for it to be over and done with so that i can have more time =)
anyway i've been trying real hard to absorbed as much as possible today but it was a utter failure.... couldnt concentrate and ended up playing my hp games..... yup sort of thought through how many factors involved and ya.... most of it were the same reasons la =)...

above are all products of boredom......

o and do you all know of the new gatsby advertisement?
the moving rubber thingy hahaha.....

haha i saw the video on youtube and it was so funny la

so i brought one too =D
dont ask why its pink.... different colour got different uses =0

2007-06-22T20:46:00.001+08:00

wohoot... its been a long long time since i last blogged... well been busy these few days... with ya, lots of stuff... been going out alot of times =D studying but donno how much actually sinked in....

actually been really distracted these few days with ya.... stuffs but dont worry, can still concentrate... i hope...

disappointed cause i didnt get the scholarship... really needed it but hiaz... guess i aint good enough... now... will try again but just really dont like their interviews though.

and well, guess this is it... i will tolerate and i will accept... though a change is always good though =) cause my sleeves arent long enough to keep all my tricks you know =p

yup 2 more days before i convert back from a sponge to a vomiting machine to a normal human again.... ahhhhh stupid mid years... o and its so ironic....
phy has 4 and 1/2 chapters
chem has 6 chapters
maths has around 6
and econs for me has 5 chapters....
so little chapters... and the june holidays are still not enough....
bottom line.... it sucks

2007-06-16T21:42:00.000+08:00

camp sparex is finally over.... and i must say... woallllllllll it was damn cool.... but i was also painful
two ways...

day one....
it was kinda rush... i was initially in the group shrek.... ( there were sherk, transformer, spiderman, priates of the carribien and harry potter) then was tranfered to harry potter....
well my group got the most crap GL of them all la.... edmond la... damn crap la....
but ya, day one was fun and games la.... quite interesting...
we had a amazing race around the ntu campus and i find the spiderman cheer very interesting....

alamak
wa sa pa
pi li pa ler ai bu pa
spider ni pa bu pa?
spider spider wo bbu pa
spider ni pa bu pa?
s[ider spider wo bu pa
tian bu pa
di bu pa
spider spdier sa sa sa

haha lol....

day 2..... hiong camp finally start
had tonnes of stuff... training, foot work, basics of stretching, sparring techniques, sparring stations, and the crazy night training..... mad....
o did i mention i was the mascot for harry potter and we did a crazy "star wars hokkien ver " for the wa si lin lao pei..... HAHAHA
then... was rather.... well... hurt, but it is a thing of the past ler..... wont mind it anymore....

day 3... here comes the actual sparring.... and i was one of the suay j1 to spar with a ntu senior.... my gl jun zhe.... wa he damn pro la... his icks are faster than mine and he is more skillful than me... in the end the score was 4 - 4 and i lost in the sudden death.... then i lost motivation to spar anymore... was still kinda affected by last night....
total injuries... 2 cramped up thighs.... 2 bruises.... 5 cuts... woahs

2007-06-15T20:52:00.000+08:00

I'm using gprs now. But dont really care...
Just wanna say... It breaks...

2007-06-11T22:10:00.000+08:00

once apon a time... long long ago... there was a cat called jack.

early on morning... jack was snoozing in his warm bed... then he was woken up by his alarm...
though he wanted to sleep more, he knew he had to wake up today as he had to go out to play with his friends today... filled with excitment, he went to clean his fur and brushed them so that he would be early to meet his friends.... as he left his house, he saw and said "heys! the sky is so blue and beautiful today =D"

then as he reached the meeting place...he was early, like most of the time anyway, so he sat down by the tree and looked at the beautiful surrounding.... yet the beauty covers up the inner most meaning....
when everyone was there, jack was overjoyed and they proceeded to the playground they used to play.
they had tonnes of fun at the play ground... playing in the sand box, going down the slide and playing the swing.... then as jack got tired... he went to take a break while everyone continued to play on.... then when jack rested enough, he continued to play on.. but by then, his friends wanted to rest already... bbut jack tried to get them to play on with him....then he noticed..... "ooo the sky is getting cloudy"

when he tried to help the others up to play with him... the pushed him back and he was knocked off balanced.... and he dropped into the river. jack couldnt swim... and as he was drowning, he could feel the sadness inside him as he felt that push was like his friends didnt wanted him to do anything with them... its like as though he was redundant....his last vision before darkness angulfed him, he saw a dark gloomy sky.

when jac regained concious, he was in a warm blanket.... astonished, he umped down from the blanket and he looked around the unfamiliar place... it was a warm and cozy room, but there were some mud splatters all over the place... as jack ventured further into the room, he saw a young woman in the kitchen... she looks like she was bandaging herself... then jack knew... he had been saved by the young woman.... so he went up to her and rubbed against her legs... but then, the woman pushed jack away.... shocked, jack could not understand why... but then the woman said " i saved you from drowning, but in the process you scratch my hand. then i brought you to my house and you struggled and made the room dirty. then now you can still come up against me.... "

jack's heart tore up into a million pieces.... he didnt know wat to do...
he only knew of one thing.... there was a pain inside of him... and it feels as though as his heart was being pressed against the wall....
he couldnt speak...
he could hardly breathe...
and he just stayed there...

2007-06-09T11:54:00.001+08:00

Its was a wild roller coaster ride...
my hands still trembles as i'm typing this...
the image burnt deep into my eyes....
the memories replaying inside my heart everytime i think about it...
and yes... it was not the house of wax....

it was of one, yet it was of both...
it should have been stop, yet it had lost control....
it was mine, yet it was yours...

it was direct and clear cut, yet it was oblivious and unclear...

it is all.... but a memory now... tucked deep away inside of me.... yet it always seem to reappear.... everytime.

2007-06-06T22:29:00.000+08:00

woah... wat a muggerable week.... if you wan to put it that way lar....
but on the whole i would say i "have" been studying this week.... but if you break down the minor details.... ie 20% study 30%slack 30%dreaming 20%playing me hp......
haha ya.... LOL

so didnt do much during the time i was suppose to be studying but when i actually did... it was not too bad lar....
=( just that i kanna bully alot today by..... well dont wan to name names la hor... very bad =(.
and ya.... i was promoted to 6H today.... LOLx haha.... see if you can think of anymore Hs next time.....

yup so tml got movie marathon at rachel's house.... hehehe bring horror movie to freak shuli out =D

2007-06-04T22:55:00.000+08:00

happy day... shalala its so nice to be happy =) shalala

haha yup... start of a new week =) and the start of a new month.
well, it has been a really really fast but nice holiday =( wished it wasnt so fast though...
but yup, it was the memories that counts... and i will treasure those moments =)
and i am looking forward to more fond memories ahead =)

anyway... went to airport to study again with the " sub 5 " gang -_- LOL haha but there was only the four of us there cause dajie donno how, overslept and replied my msg at 3 15 .....
hahax, me and rachel were late and when we reached, we saw regina on high hahah donno why but she was high the whole day ya.....
then i left at 5 to go for tkd and met back the sub4 for dinner at subway =) haha, kinda went on high then =)...

haha wat a nice day...
you are so HHHH =)
but i am HHHHH hahahx =p

2007-06-02T22:29:00.000+08:00

WAHHHHHHHH SOOOO HAPPY TODAY =D x.x

but time seems to hate me.... always walk away so fast one...
when it happened... time seem to stopped but it was running away so quickly...
just wanted more time to be with you =(.....

anyway tonnes of other things happened today but they werent impt compared to this la...

so yup =D time.... hate it

2007-06-01T21:27:00.000+08:00

haha... nothing much to say today cause nothing much was said just much was done today =D

except i was rather disappointed with the turnout at the tkd practice today... was so sian that i left early to join rachel they all...

AHHHH SO FREAKING HAPPY TODAY!!!!!!!!! =D

2007-05-31T21:05:00.000+08:00

haah... like i said, holidays are good =) its give you free time to kill when you normally you dont even have any free time and then you start regretting that you didnt had anymore free time to kill when you didnt even have time in the first place.... hahahax

yup so yesterday.......

had chinese in the morning and went out in the afternoon =D.... went to vivo to watch Sherk3 haha and even though movie cost 9.50 for sneaks, it was worth it la =)
but sry for making you worry =) just too much gas in my stomach...

and then today...

it was vesak day...
so had to go temple and bai bai....
then ate the free food there but it was substandard this year...
but still, cant complain... it was free.
then went to the PC show at suntec today with moses and rachel...
moses brought a m2 card while i brought a m2 card with 1 gd thumbdrive...
and it was bloody crowded....
then we went to liang sheng to help moses see his punching bag...
and then we went to walk walk after which....
then spent a long time trying to decide on wat to eat....hahax
then we took the bus home.... should have taken the mrt but it was still ok =)
kinda felt it was due to the lucky ring bah =D
just love those bus rides =)

2007-05-29T21:11:00.000+08:00

hiazzzz damn boring today man..... got chem in the morning and it was super sianzzz
was talking to yakai the whole time haha...
then after that had to go home to change cause the phy spa in the afternoon had to be in sch uniform...
not to mention the phy spa was easy =D.... then yup, nothing much interesting today LOL...
except for the dumb pics i took for the MRS li oraganisation LOL
shall upload them some other day...

ps. MRS = Moses Ryan Shu li =D

2007-05-28T23:28:00.000+08:00

woah... GP today was surprisingly easy today and there was not much thinking that was needed out of it, just had to write.... but the problem would be whether i expressed my points properly and whether i paraphrased the passage properly anot =p...

well it was a fun day with many funny thing that happened during the NE tour to Changi Chapel.....
but the main highlight was still the movie =) pirates of the Caribbean 3 at worlds end =).... but i kinda think i did too much =( maybe i should have done that and just did wat we used to..... hope you werent uncomfortable with it.... if you were must tell me k =)

2007-05-27T22:34:00.000+08:00

hmmm today was a nice and happy day =D haha...

lots of things happened today and well the main thing is that i got to try out my new K810i =) haha its so nice but arh... kinda jealous of it =( make me feel so bad haha....

then there was studying... well for the good half of the studying wasnt pretty much studying at all though... was erms... how should i say, procrastinating bah =) haha

o and then we some how got some new insights on " current affairs " muhahaha, donno wats really going on but we kinda have a rough idea =) shall investigate further....

anyway, just kinda feel that i took too much sugar today already =) haha must be your fault =P... anyway they say sugar good mah=) makes everything nice nice one

hiaxxxx..... now must get back to earth liao, nid to return from lala land =( ..... got GP exam tml and i havent got any confirmation from the scholarship thingy.... nids tonnes of luck ler

2007-05-26T22:47:00.000+08:00

YEAAAAA got my new K810i ler =)... muhaha so fun....

yes i know, i got it abit ealier... but dont worry k =) you will get it soon too =) i will wait for you k?
till then, you better take good care of yourself hor... dont fall sick =(

2007-05-25T23:20:00.000+08:00

i've just finished cleaning my room... and i must say, its not a job for the weak hearted.

anyway, today was an interesting day, though it began with me feeling the brought- forward effects of being moody last night. thought i was gonna be late for chinese today so i took the cab to sch, then guess wat? lessons were scheduled to start 30 min later -_- wasted $6.50 for nothing argh... well, chinese lesson was rather constructive and interesting after all... course its without the complacent elements in 111 la. This was followed by an interesting beginning to GP whereby a head suddenly pop out from the window on the door. then it turns out to be your GP tutor.... i repeat GP TUTOR and he enters and say "tong xue men, da jia qin shang qi sang ke" LOL... ya it was Mr Max la.

so after all the funny funny lessons, went back to dmn to collect my O lvl cert.... haha nothing really interesting happened except for our little talk. YA, and i must say, TALK LA... no use avoiding liao.

then, went home to change and we =) went to novena square to look for some small small shirts.... now this is where something really really REALLY interesting happened....
At the Alijunied Mrt station, a grp of ppl in the mrt noticed a gigantic thingy that looked like a tornado... and when we turned around and look.... WA LAO SIA LA!!!!!!!!! FREAK OUT MAN!!!!! X.X it was really big!!! really looked like a tornado..... but then it turned out to be a gigantic water spout -_-.... hahaha you freaked out so much sia =D thought it was the end of the world hahaha =) dont worry k.
ya and then later part is not needed to be mentioned =D

then later at night, went to changi airport to send my cousin and jui mu off to brisbane.... =( shld have gone with them but got GP =( DAMNIT!!!!!!

haha, interesting way to start off the "holidays" ......
anyway, dont feel guilty ok =)

2007-05-24T22:39:00.000+08:00

officially, today is the last day of school before the june holidays.... but ya, as we are in the sg sch system of a jc.... life is never so easy -_-..... my holidays are pretty much book with studies, tkd sparring camp, tkd competition, tkd training, phy olympia stuffs etc etc.... argh.

today was the soccer finals.... mj lost to rj... kinda expected after watching the first half.... ya so couldnt feel the intensity and atmosphere of the competition soon after....

well, the bus journey was extremely entertaining..... filled with violence....

then after all those..... well, i kinda nearly blew it..... lets just say i was extremely pissed..... shall say no further as after it ignited, a chain of event caused it to last even further....

dont worry, i'm not blaming you, after all it was my fault.

2007-05-23T22:24:00.000+08:00

i thought i couldnt stand it anymore...
i thought i couldnt bear it any further...
i thought i couldnt keep it inside of my any longer...

but luckily, i did... phewwww..... if i didnt... chances are it was going to be ugly..... real ugly.

well it was Colosseum today and it was kinda fun actually =) towards the ending part of the activity only.... well kinda realise the assholticness of the PE department today.... damn idiotic dumb donkeys who cant even understand simple logic and control their own temper.... childish pms ******....

well congratz anyways =D good for you =).... no nid to see stinky face ler HAHAHA lol ^^...

YEA... 07S101... the NERD 4H2 class... those who think we are muggers are dead WRONG!!!! WE ARE MAX MERIDIAN CLASS WOHOOT !!!!!!!!!!!!!! a.k.a fittest class =D

2007-05-22T01:35:00.000+08:00

its 1.30 am now.....
its hot and stuffy.....
my throat is dry, parched and sore.... just very uncomfortable....
i'm itching all over....
and worst of all, i cant sleep....

o well.... a few funny things happened earlier on back on "yesterday" lol...
didnt make it into the TKD captain post.... saddened but ya, nvm lor.... guess wat wasnt meant to be isnt meant to be... just hope that the new captain will be a good one though.
after which... received tonnes of consolation from lots of ppl.... ya i'm fine now thx =)

well...guess its good things that happen to me will be balanced out with bad things huh... cause prior to the result of the exco, i found out i made it to 2nd round of interview for the scholarship... but still, passion is more than benefit..... and the sadness lingers on.... though not for long =D

2007-05-19T21:04:00.000+08:00

well... i can only say that the scholarship interview was pretty much crap... LOL but it was interesting none the less... filled with funny qns and weird ans... haha, donno whether i can make it a not.

yup after that went studying and welll.... you can say i was kinda pissed during a short moment... but then it was just a short moment.... kinda disappointed today.

think i am going nuts and will become nuts soon.... crazy insane thoughts keep on filling my head and my sight is not at where it should be.... kinda losing track of my path and my morals in life.... donno why, guess i need to refresh my thoughts real soon.... maybe a drastic change might help or some detergent to clean my head will do it good....

well..... gonna visit the toilet for the 7th time today now..... watery shit.... you get the drift...

2007-05-18T22:46:00.001+08:00

its been a long time since i last blogged and it has been for a ( hopefully ) fruitful purpose.....

well since then... many many things had happened and i am rather proud to say that i have made quite a number of achievements this past few days.... got into physics Olympiad, got into the first selection for meridian scholarship, got gold for napfa, finished making the TKD shirt, won in 2 events for my TKD competition=) 4th for individual and 2 for group pattern, and ya..... lasted for 2 weeks ler =)

well but it had not been smooth sailing though, lost quite few stuffs and been quite forgetful and snail these few days.... might be the lack of sleep but well, they were kinda worth it though =)....

now i know.... what it feels like, to be in a winter wonder land.... everything seems cold, yet it is filled with purpose and joy.... cold to the touch yet warm to the heart.....
i am filled with purpose again ^^

2007-05-10T23:10:00.000+08:00

its been a really really long day with my tkd just ended an hour ago.... yet, i have this pressing issue within my heart that i would like to address to now...

in life... there are many things which help to mould us into the person we are now... and i believe that one of the most impt thing in life... is our friends..
i mean seriously, wat are friends for? they are the ppl in life whom you hang out with, play with. enjoy life with, suck your school life with, complain bout how sch suck to... basically everything outside your home, its always with your friends... they are impt in life...
as a friend, i feel that it would be best to put others above self... its the morally right thing to do and not to be selfish... i mean its just equal... cause they put you more impt then they put themselves...
as a person... i know, i shouldnt forget the past.. neither should i live for them either.... remember the past, live for the future.... but would it be really bad... that on your "moving on with life" you just dump your friends there... and switch to a new bunch of friends WHICH (i'm not even saying whom here" will suit to your new NEEDS... then cause your old FRIENDS are just not good for your SELF CENTRED GOALS... you leave them....

so, i'm just stating my PERSONAL OPINION HERE...
its ok to move on...
its ok to change..
just feel that, its not right to make empty promises...
not good to dump your friends and make them look like some product on sale...
not good to ACT like they are still friends when deep down, you might not wan to hang out with them anymore....
not good to ACT in the first place.... cause its quite clear to see
then not good to leave and make ppl rmb you in the wrong way....
might as well leave and dont let ppl fan about you and think why did you do this why did you do that blah blah blah....

why dont you just say it out or CLARIFY THE TRUTH FACE TO FACE while you are still friends.....

just hope that the msg has reached the relevant ppl involved... cause if not, wont be my lost anyway either rite?

2007-05-10T23:09:00.001+08:00

life... its all about failures and successes.... its all about ups and downs in life....
but hey.... wat for sweat the small stuffs in life? you are always distracted by the minor little things in life which are bad.... and you forget that life is always better out there. Failure is but another path to success... it may be a longer route, but it will definitely get you there =)... as long as you try, you know why you fail and then you learn... then your life is enriched... by the experience you gain from trying again.... then when you eventually succeed... you feel proud =D and you gain that sense of satisfaction like never before.... thats when it all matters in life... to feel great about the end instead of worrying about the process

2007-05-08T20:44:00.000+08:00

well.... tonnes of good things seems to be happening to me recently =D. haha, first there was the time i felt cold.... then i had my air guys outing... then had my blues...then came my power grp for pw... then now, i found out i was shortlisted for the meridian scholarship =D

haha happy things just keeps compounding in =)....

but some of you all might not know.... i always get this feeling, that when i gain something.... i will tend to lose something else... when something nice happens to me.... it would often balance out with something bad... hopefully.... history does not repeat.

well, one things for sure....
the raging flames cannot be stopped.
spreading like a wild fire across all that can be seen
choices were given...
to end it... or to let it spread...
looks like we have to make a path of our own...
it cant be stopped
yet it cannot be allowed to carry on...
think a slight drizzle would be prefect

2007-05-07T22:48:00.000+08:00

monday.... the day, all students dread.....
the start of another 5 grueling days of hardwork, boring lecture and incomprehensible tutorials... thats life man...... though its often filled with the blue lights for me though =D

so, finally found out bout my pw grps today, and WOW, POWER GRP SIA!!!!!! MUAHAHA.... our grp is gonna own the house down =D

but i was quite worried, after today's pw lecture.... i was rather contenplating the workload ahead of us... not so much that i cant cope... but rather i wont have time....
ahhhh have to sacrifice my social time with friends like that....
THATS IT, i'm gonna enjoy my june holidays no matter wat!!!!!!

2007-05-06T23:32:00.000+08:00

well.... never update since yesterday ler....

sat...

went to watch spiderman 3 AGAIN...LOL but this time was with the air guys ya... haha we all long time no see ler so did lots of catching up yea....
haha, well, i learnt from praba that not only mjc was the mini dmn..... tp is also a mini dmn too.... turn everywhere also can see one dmn ppl... LOL and that poly life is also very hectic..... trust me.... maddddddd...
haha and ponku is also in the same situation as us.... failing test LOL haha in tjc....

today....

went to study at the airport today... and well, think its gonna be the last time there ler... cause they were chasing us out of the usual place =(..... so in the end went to the bk at T1 to study...
well kinda felt that today wasnt very productive..... donno why, maybe cause there was too much sugar in my tea ? =D

haha so left early and went for tkd....well, ok la could have been better.... lacked only one impt thing only..... haha

o ya anyway.... LOVESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS my new CAT...... and his name is JACK =D

2007-05-05T00:08:00.000+08:00

wat a longday it was.... mad rush too....
first had to settle the money for tkd shirt...
then had to pass the money to shu li...
then had to rush home to get grading card...
then had to rush to meet rachel they all and follow mosses to make ic....
then we all went to vivo to watch spiderman 3...
then had tot rush to eat dinner....

LOL.... mad rush.....

anyway.... thoughts are clear... and things are better now...

well, can i say WAY WAY better =D

2007-05-03T23:10:00.000+08:00

words were meant for us to communicate...
they were made, so that everyone could understand one and another
but yet.....
words are not enough.....
to express how i feel...
why?

i think i should just let it out.... but i know it would just be a selfish act.
but i think its becoming obvious ler....
i'm letting too many clues out of the bag... dont even know whether they figured it out yet...
but think its a 50/50 thing..
either you know
or you dont
dumb

so me and wen qi went to paya lebar to settle the tkd shirts thingy...
only by tml then can settle finish...
sian...
tired...
and near brain dead....

i'm just out to find...
the better part of me...
i'm more than a bird,
more than a plane,
more than some pretty face beside a train...
and its not easy to be me.....

wish that i could cry....
fall upon my knees...
find a way to lie...
bout a home i'll never see

2007-05-02T20:42:00.000+08:00

so.... wat can i say but that taekwondo was fun today =) haha we did 150 jumping jacks and woah.... shoik man.... then there was the democratic voting of shirt design... and guess wat, they picked me design yea =) haha yeah.... so yea, gonna make the tkd shirt with wen qi and shu li and nisa.... haha

and yar.... back to my life... i couldnt sleep the night before, keep on thinking bout it and it made me felt really uneasy. But i came to one conclusion. the fastest way to end this... is to let them know... but it would mean more ppl will become fan and that it might interfere with their life.... wat should i do, should i just tell you? and end it all....
or should i wait, and hold on to the life that i have right now?

2007-05-01T20:13:00.000+08:00

like 2 candles, their flames wavering against the wind
both, lit brightly inside my heart....
both, refusing to give in....
sometimes, on will dim down....
other times, the other will give in....
when come the time, when one fads away?
when come the time, when my choice would be made?
when come the time, when faith will overcome fate?

guess it became clear to others..... even friends who long time no see could tell that something was wrong.... and even they wished me gg.......

wat ever the case.... its exactly the same for both side.... one supporting the other....
one knows it....
one in the oblivion....
one say i ming ming like the other...
one say, i should just follow my heart....

my heart was torn to 2..... a trouble that came in pairs.....

should i just tell both of them.... everything?
even though i know that the one in the who doesnt know....
has her own problems....
wont i be too selfish?

i dont know wat to do....

oh my..... i nid help

2007-04-30T21:54:00.000+08:00

school was fun.....
hope that school will be fun...
hope i wont be fan.... anymore....

went to school.... celebrated anqi birthday... then got sonboon birthday.... then got tkd april birthday babies cake....

3 cakes in a row.... not bad

so there is it.... another day pass..... another moment spent....
but the thoughts has not settled in yet....

i asked 4 ppl.... my bro and 3 close friends.... 3 replied....
all 3 different ans....
leaving me back to square one

think i shouldnt have said..... now it makes me feel... weird..... and......
just weird